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Paper Offline OP
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Without going into detail, she has said she is done, she has an EA currently, and I am just kicking in DB last resort for my own sanity and with vague hopes.

A friend of hers who doesn't know anything is going on, contacted me saying their last contact had her very concerned about (my wife). My wife was talking so much about freedom, happiness, and doing what she wanted it concerned her. I did not reveal anything to this friend other than we are facing challenges. However she did on her own contact my wife expressing her concerns.

Now I am worried that my wife thinks I am going around to all her friends telling them to help me convince her. This is NOT the case.

Question1
Do I tell my wife that this friend contacted me, and I told her nothing? I can't have my wife being even MORE determined to end it thinking I am rallying people against her.

Question2
My wife is not used to me at all not asking about her day, doing things on my own etc. I have no doubt within days if not in one day she will notice. What do I say when she asks - don't you want to know about MY day? Or if she asks - why are you scheduling things to do with the kids without me? Or if she asks - why are you ignoring me?

I would appreciate from a DB perspective how I deal with these things. Do I tell my wife the friend contacted me, and how do I answer her questions about my 180?

Joined: Feb 2011
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Hi Paper. Sorry your are here but this is the right place.

Originally Posted By: Paper
Question1
Do I tell my wife that this friend contacted me, and I told her nothing? I can't have my wife being even MORE determined to end it thinking I am rallying people against her.


No...Don't do that at all. If your wife asks if you are doing this, just say no.

Originally Posted By: Paper
Question2
My wife is not used to me at all not asking about her day, doing things on my own etc. I have no doubt within days if not in one day she will notice. What do I say when she asks - don't you want to know about MY day? Or if she asks - why are you scheduling things to do with the kids without me? Or if she asks - why are you ignoring me?


Just keep up your LRT and 180s. GAL and have fun! If she asks you about it, just tell her she is more then welcome to come with you with the kids.


Me: 39
W: 44
SS 24
SD: 20
M: 13
T: 15
Bomb: 2/16/11
EA: 2/14/11
Papers Signed 4/13/11
Divorced 5/13/11
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I wonder if he reads any replies, or just starts another thread? crazy


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
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Cmon. Bear with me. I am confused and hurting. The delays in posting don't help.

I appreciate that you all understand me irrational mental state.

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