Let's put it this way. You've been there the whole time and she didn't open up to you. Not really. Keep things friendly and light, but let her go. She wants out, she has to feel what being out means.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
yeah i agree. i just don't want her to think that she can't come back. but she does need to feel like i am gone. one more catch 22 in all of this mess lol
BITS
M 11/11/00 Bomb end of September 2010 Filed 11/9/10
"i just don't want her to think that she can't come back."
You've told her that before haven't you? Time to live your life. You were scared for so long that you didn't communicate with her sooner. Too little too late. Strengthen yourself and enrich your life.
Take the new opportunities you have been given and run with them.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
Very tough "Catch 22," buddy. But, take a look at what happened to me the other night when I decided to let my guard down. She came back on Monday with a hammer. It will be hard, but you are going to have to let her feel like you are gone. Otherwise, she will never feel the true sting of what she has done.
Good luck!
FOBD
Me: 39 W: 36 T: 15 yrs M: 9 yrs S: 09/10
So you can get on with your search, baby And I can get on with mine And maybe someday we will find, That it wasn't really wasted time...
so, i went to see her lastnight to get some things (mostly mail) from her and give her a drill i had borrowed (my drill!) lol
we met at the door and everything was normal. she gave me the bag of stuff and i sat it down to talk to her for a minute. i asked her "how have you been doing?" ... she instantly teared up and was about to full blown cry. she did the same thing the last time that i saw her and when she did that time i left pretty quickly but this time i stayed and decided to just talk to her. i changed the subject from her to me so that i could maybe take some pressure off of her and started to tell her about my new job and how awesome it was yadda yadda.
as an interesting side note most of you know that i have primarily made my living playing poker online for the past three years and THE DAY that i started my new job online poker in the united states was effectively shut down lol. pretty crazy coincidence!
so, she was wiping away tears but laughing at my jokes and smiling a lot i kept the conversation focused on what has been going on in my life. i told her to let me know if she needed anything and left it at that. i had wanted to have "the talk" with her where i tell her i'm sorry that things didn't work out but that i just want her to be happy... i left without getting into that because she seemed ready to cry at any second. i think i'm going to start texting her this week with some light hearted contact and maybe work in a phone call or two. it seems obvious to me that she is not happy with where she is at and i think that i have a good opportunity to be a shoulder for her to lean on. that's just my take but would like to hear you guys' advice.
BITS
M 11/11/00 Bomb end of September 2010 Filed 11/9/10
Where is the rule that says to go dark and have no contact? Maybe now is the time to start a little contact with her. Nothing heavy by any means and not too often, just a simple hello or some article about wine (she does like wine right).
