Time for a new thread. I'll quote my last update, FYI.
Quote:
Ahhh....I know I should be updating here, but NOTHING ever happens! Kids go to school, don't do their homework, teachers call, the house gets cleaned, laundry gets done, appointments are kept...life goes on.
2 weeks ago, my brother was killed in a hit and run accident. My family is devastated. Our hearts are broken and, again, I try to live with another hole in my heart.
H was predictably in MLC selfish mode. I blasted him for not staying with the kids while I went to Chicago to be by brother's side. I left the older girls alone and took DS13 with me.
H did take the girls for dinner a couple of times, and spent a day at the house, fixing little things. He actually made arrangements to have the garage door fixed, rather than the old telling me who to call. Since i returned home, he has been kinda pesty, contacting me multiple times a day over small things. He has been to the house more in the last week than in the last 9 months combined. He is coming today to replace his brake pads.
Yesterday, he was talking about selling some inventory and said, "or you could get a job." I replied with a nonchalant "I will not get a job to support your philandering." I didn't wait for a response, and left the room.
He is trying to team up to get me to work on finding ways to save $. If we were partners, I would do anything to alleviate the stress and pressure he is under financially. Now though, I feel it is his problem, just as he feels the kids and their issues are mine alone.
In this touch and go, I am calm, confident, and really do not care what he is up to (mostly, just observing). FOR REAL. No as if at the moment. I am there.
He is gone. I find his presence and contact annoying. I am ok. I am dealing with a different kind of grief, and what is going on in my life has nothing to do with him.
Thank you for your recent kind comments there hpb, CW and Mystic.
(((WN))) I am very sorry for your loss. Do whatever it is you need to grieve and completely ignore your MLCer H as you and your family get through this.
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
I am muddling through my days. Seems like time is flying by. I do not want it to. Every day takes me a day further away from Michael. I have been in daily contact with his fiance. I feel so bad for her. and him. They had so many wonderful plans together....
H is not bothering me. His neglect of the kids always saddens me. I do the best I can with them, encouraging compassion for him. I know how damaging to their self worth it can be when your dad behaves like a jerk. I know I cannot shame or force him in any way to be a father. It is best to move forward without him. H already wonders. He actually complained that the contact from them is "one-sided". Well duh!
"If you strike me down, I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!" 1st thread
