Took me 3 months to get to this point, but here I am. I have poured over these boards, just ordered the books this week and will sign up with a coach for my 1st meeting next week.
I am buying time, seperated for the last 3 months. She has stated she wants to start over with someone else,she has changed, and really is indifferent to me and has been. She comes from a family where everyone, I mean everyone has been divorced.
I don't want a divorce, I have no plans to file, she hasn't filed either. When is a situation hopeless? I don't want to give up. Not sure what to do.
Up until this point, there are no affairs, at least that I was aware of, certainly wasn't one by me. I am not naive, I realize she probably left me for the chance to see someone in particular.
Seems hopeless, but I don't want to give up and keep trying.
Last edited by Lostinlife; 09/23/1005:19 AM.
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
We have 2 boys under 5, the hardest part is knowing that she wants someone else in their life. I don't want to be a part time Dad. There was no abuse at all in our marriage, in fact we got along quite well.
I love my wife dearly, I love my kids. I never thought this would happen.
Last edited by Lostinlife; 09/23/1012:08 PM.
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
such a damn shame - the only thing you can do is work on yourself - it's all you have right now.
be strong and remember this is about YOU not her.
I've been trying. This started off as "I need space", turning into the "Something inside me has changed" and now is the "We didn't get along well enough, I want to start over, you'll find someone else someday"
We got along great, we had a wonderful vacation prior to her leaving, we had all sorts of plans with the kids.
She changed so fast, not caring about what this seperation is doing to everyone else. I guess throughout the whole time, I was convinced she would eventually remember what a family was. The thought of someone else with my kids kills me. I have no desire to be with anyone else besides my wife....I took our vows seriously.
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
Also wanted to add, as it is becoming more and more obvious to me they are never coming home, it is starting to hit me that the boys aren't there when I come home from work anymore.
The fact that there is nothing I can do for my family right now to bring everyone home is just depressing.
The fact that I love this woman and she is indifferent to me is hard to understand.
Last edited by Lostinlife; 09/23/1003:18 PM.
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
