Please believe I do not want to rain on your parade, but remember "Believe nothing they say" My H lied to my face, his kids, everybody, and then just presented her like she'd been there all along.
For your sake, I hope and pray he is telling you the truth, just hope it's not the truth as the MLC'r sees it.
I wanted to let everyone know how happy I am today! GAL - hiking everyday, enjoying my girls, my friends, my family, my life! I was shopping last night for the first time since BOM on July 3rd and I have dropped 3 pant sizes!!! I haven't felt this good about myself in years.
Husband or not, I am doing ok and I feel good! Today is the first time I really feel like I will make it through this crisis.
TAMF m:41 xh:41 T: 20 M: 15 D: 16 D: 14 Bomb dropped: 7/3/10 separated: 7/15/10 H moved in to new apt. with OW: 7/1/11 divorced: 8/26/12
I wanted to let everyone know how happy I am today! GAL - hiking everyday, enjoying my girls, my friends, my family, my life! I was shopping last night for the first time since BOM on July 3rd and I have dropped 3 pant sizes!!! I haven't felt this good about myself in years.
Husband or not, I am doing ok and I feel good! Today is the first time I really feel like I will make it through this crisis.
Glad to hear it!
PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
A few months ago he began having an EA with a woman at work, I confronted him and he said he wanted our marriage to be like it was before and she had noticed that something was wrong with him. When I confronted him, he was already contemplating leaving. After we talked he said he wanted to work things out. I had no idea he felt this way.
Things were great for about a month and then he started saying that he wasn't sure if he wanted to be married. He kept saying I hurt him too badly, that I pushed him away. He said he had felt like this for a couple of years.
He started crying alot and staying away from our home- staying out until early morning and drinking pretty heavily.
He moved out of our home about 4 weeks into this and was gone for 1 week, but came back because our 12yD refused to speak to him for 3 days. He stayed for less than a week and started several arguments when I brought up our marriage. Or the fact that he still wanted to have sex, but didn't want me to have any emotional attachment to him. He even cried once afterward.
He still wanted to hold me and take care of me, which became very confusing for me because of his disconnect.
He left 11 days ago and both kids, 12yD & 8yrD, refuse to speak to him or see him. Both are sending emails/texts to him and writing in journals, leaving them for him to read. Both are being very hateful and extremely mean. I have tried talking to them and have said nothing bad about their dad. I ask them everyday if they will talk to him or see him, but both are still refusing.
12yD has sent 2 hateful emails to the OW (he works at a very small company & we all know each other very well), the latest was today & he called me to let me know. We ended up in a very big disagreement and he hung up on me.
Looking back, there was some behavior I didn't realize might be related and that has led me to believe this is MLC.
He was getting more absorbed by his job, lots of parties and late nights. Lots of drinking. Spending money on stuff that he didn't really need and isn't using. Lots of high ticket items-high dollar sporting events, expensive jewelry for both himself and me. He started asking to buy a new car about 18 months ago and it wasn't until early this year that he came out with the statement that he wanted a ferrari. He did buy a $100k sports car, not a ferrari. His father had a heart attack just about a year ago. Just around the time my H started the EA his uncle passed away. I remember now that on the night of the funeral he had quite a bit to drink (excessively drunk) and he commented that talking to his cousin made him realize that his parents could die at any time.
I'm just to a point where I'm not really sure what to do. I feel like I should stop responding to his texts. His texts to me are basically: tell the girls good morning, how was their school day & tell the girls goodnight. Occasionally, there are emails or texts about finances or about sessions with C or texts that I initiate when the kids are really upset.
He has only made an effort to see his children via email or texts. The children decided this evening that they are not going to email or text him anymore, because they become increasingly frustrated with him. He doesn't answer all of their questions & constantly tells them to ask me when they have questions about why he's doing this to our family.
There was a weekend morning that the girls & I went to breakfast & were gone for about 1.5 hours. I forgot my cell phone & for an hour he tried calling & texting. He called my cell phone 18 times & he called my daughter's cell 7 times (in addition to calling our house and driving by). I find this a little odd. Any insight would be helpful. Thank you
Welcome, You mostly likely will get more help by starting a thread of your own.
Originally Posted By: Lalapez1
He left 11 days ago and both kids, 12yD & 8yrD, refuse to speak to him or see him. Both are sending emails/texts to him and writing in journals, leaving them for him to read. Both are being very hateful and extremely mean. I have tried talking to them and have said nothing bad about their dad. I ask them everyday if they will talk to him or see him, but both are still refusing.
12yD has sent 2 hateful emails to the OW (he works at a very small company & we all know each other very well), the latest was today & he called me to let me know. We ended up in a very big disagreement and he hung up on me.
Please, be careful about how much your children know and become involved in this. If then are sending emails to the OW, they are involved way too much.
