BG, I know the urge to snoop on emails etc is really hard, but you have to stop. It's going to keep eating you alive, and preventing you from detaching and dropping the rope.
At least one good thing that comes out of this.....I can smell a lier and a cheat from miles away. I will never let anything like this happen again. Men will fear me if they are ever able to get close enough! Terrible but true. I can't ever let my guard down again and I will never let anyone in the way I let him into my life.
BAD ATTITUDE! There are A LOT of guys out there that will NOT do this to you. Remember that. Also "I will never let anyone in the way I let him into my life". Too bad, because now your playing the victim and sabotaging your future happiness.
I know your angry and it's all part of the process, but you need to look at him for what he is, not what everyone else will be. Don't do anything from here on but make yourself happy.
Hang in there! Jump off the hate train, and focus on becoming everything you want to be.
I know that I will likely set myself up for hurt again....that is just the kind of person I am. I have always been determined and I am always willing to do anything to make it work. So I know that eventually I will put myself out there and run the risk of going through the same thing again. I have hope for this future and I life that I always thought I would have. I don't think I will ever let go of that hope and it is that hope that drives me forward everyday. I have always believed that I am a very negative person and I actually allowed my H to convince me of how negative I am but if there is only one thing that i could take away from all that has happened...
I realize that i am not negative. Yes I do get stressed about life and i do worry about my business and tend to over react about things but I am not negative. In fact through all that has happened with my marriage I have always remained as positive as possible. The only negative person in the sit. is my H!
I started to believe that I was a downer b/c my H had convinced me of this but I know that i am not. I get passionate about things and yes sometimes things aren't all roses and fairy princesses but I am a good person and I do have so much to offer to someone out there that is deserving of me!
He is the loser and one day I hope that he realizes it...i guess this will be my revenge.
M=42 H=51 Common-law 6yr Children: 11yr old daughter (previous marrIage) 6yr old son Bomb dropped January 2013
I am thinking about signing up for a photography class. I was really into photography when I was in university and enjoyed developing my film and dark room work. So i am looking into maybe a beginner digital course or something. It might be a good start to get me doing something I enjoy and meet some new people as well.
M=42 H=51 Common-law 6yr Children: 11yr old daughter (previous marrIage) 6yr old son Bomb dropped January 2013
Good for you with photography class. And as for snooping. You know you are finally in the right place when you don't care to know anymore, so there is no reason to snoop. It took me a while to get there.
Me 44, W 39, S 6, D 6, M 21 Bomb June 18, 2010 I filed D July 20, 2010 W filed counter suit Aug 2 Rings came off Aug 5, 2010
I don't know how to deal with the H. Now he keeps saying that i went to his work and that people have told him that i have been seen there. He has gone on to say that i have been seen with the district manager!
It is crazy. I have not been anywhere near his work or with his district manager. I did not get him fired and yet he is adimate that I did all of this and says that people are telling him as such.
I know I just need to ignore what he is saying but I just can't help myself and it ends in arguing.
I just spoke to him on the phone. It didn't go over well. I am trying not to argue but it is so difficult with him.
I am on a conference at the end of september and I have asked him to take care of our D. I asked him to not have the OW over at our house and that i do not want our D around her at all. He got angry and hung the phone up on me. Called him back. I am so tired of the games. I don't think what i am asking is in anyway unreasonable. I am so tired of it.
He agreed that he would not have our D around her but had to put in the dig that our D is safe with her and she is not a bad person.
Disgusting. It is one thing to have an affair it is completely something else when you start to involve your children. I don't understand where his head is at.
M=42 H=51 Common-law 6yr Children: 11yr old daughter (previous marrIage) 6yr old son Bomb dropped January 2013
He is angry and it's impossible to speak with someone when they are that way.
As for him saying you were at his job... if he brings it up again, state very clearly and calmly that you were not and have nothing to do with his getting fired. If he doesn't believe you, that is his choice. Do not argue back though. It will get you nowhere.
