- Just signed D papers in the past month - I took the house - we have 50/50 arrangement, have it so that she has them in the day and I have them at night, and we alternate weekends. So - yes - they LIVE with me, and they go to school based on my address - It's probably too early to date but you're probably going to do it anyway. Wii is right, everyone is different. Keep it simple.
Thought I'd throw my hat in, since we have some similar things going on. Welcome!!
The initial attention is great. I see how affairs start. Honestly, if W ask to work on us I would probably say yes, but I don't think she has it in her to get past the last year of emotions.
She stated she hasn't forgiven me yet and doesn't know if she will ever get over it.
So, altough I'm moving forward, I'm going to be taking it slow and steady.
How did you make out with the house? gr8
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
The initial attention is great. I see how affairs start.
Yeah, of course. That's why you have to be careful.
Originally Posted By: gr8 day 2B alive
Honestly, if W ask to work on us I would probably say yes, but I don't think she has it in her to get past the last year of emotions.
Can relate
Originally Posted By: gr8 day 2B alive
She stated she hasn't forgiven me yet and doesn't know if she will ever get over it.
Because you're dating?
Originally Posted By: gr8 day 2B alive
How did you make out with the house?gr8
Well – 1) We agreed I could afford it, and we didn’t want to move the kids out of their home 2) Turned out the equity was mine anyway, based on the assets I brought into the marriage 3) Gave up all the mutual funds, stock, and some of my 401k
Originally Posted By: gr8 day 2B alive She stated she hasn't forgiven me yet and doesn't know if she will ever get over it. Because you're dating?
Has nothing to do with me dating. It's all about the M. I admitted my wrong doings, corrected them and showed her I was taking serious action to rectify the situation.
Still, after doing all this and validating her feelings and DBing my butt off, She still has resentment.
She went to IC a few times but her IC told her that since these actions have been going on for X amount of years, things would't change.
W, although intelligent about some things, is totally ignorant about others.
As for my house, I hope to keep it. I should be able to, I did received an inheritence from my dad which she as no claim to.
She also owes my 5k plus her half of the mortgage for the past 8 months.
I hope the the appraiser comes in low. That would help me out. If not then time to sell.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
I was thinking about reaching out to W one last time to see if she would work on M. ( My last attempt to work on us)
Can anyone give me feedback on a WAW without an OM?
How do they feel and react after 10 months of separation?
Should I even reach out or just move on?
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
I think you've done a pretty good job in handling yourself, and wanted to give you a couple of my thoughts.
Here's one of the, if not the, most common questions at the point you are at right now. Should I move on? Like most others, you have been asking yourself this question for weeks or months. You will continue to ask yourself this question for weeks or months.
I like the advice that I've seen dday give. He got a divorce and then was remarried to his ex-wife something like 6 months later. I don't think he thought that would happen. His advice...just take today for what it is.
Should you reach out or just move on? I think the answer to that question is to take today for what it is.
You and your W have kids. You are permanently part of each others lives. Just see what happens.
I know that actions speak louder than words. I feel have tried showing her and she still resents many things. That's why I think I should speak up now, express my feelings, and see how she reacts. Try something different.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Maybe you could write it in a letter? That way she has time to process your thoughts and doesn't have to deal with them right then and there. Just a thought.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I did write a letter back in February stating want I would like in a R and M. I think and feel my progess is far enough along to give her that letter now. I will revise it though. I have nothing to lose at this point.
Although I am getting attention from OW I want to be absolutely sure about my M before I break my vows.(Yes, Sex)
Last edited by gr8 day 2B alive; 06/09/1003:55 PM.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
