Push Back from Family/Friends about DB

[BrownEyes]

Has anyone been experience family and/or friends concerned that you are trying to save your marriage.

I have only told three close friends and my parents that my H left our home. They also know he had an affair. I understand they are concerned but I'm pretty sure they are all rolling their eyes and thinking "what the hell are you doing? why would you still want to be married to hiim?"

I understand it's my life but its still difficult. I know they support me no matter what but it's hard that they don't agree.

Anyone else in a similar sitch?

[TimeHeals]

Probably everybody who has ever been in your situation whose family know about an A or EA leans toward, "Well, this is probably for the best that... <spouse> has left".


They just want to see you stop hurting and get on with your life. You can do that anyway without deciding to give up on your M. It's up to you.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Probably everybody who has ever been in your situation whose family know about an A or EA leans toward, "Well, this is probably for the best that... <spouse> has left".


They just want to see you stop hurting and get on with your life. You can do that anyway without deciding to give up on your M. It's up to you.

Yep -- this ^. Definitely.

Puppy

[papayachic]

before being in this situation, I would have also felt the same way. I would of been the friend saying, "You deserve so much better, blah blah blah"

But, you know what? Only you can decide what's better for you!
Because I know the backlash I would receive from my family/friends, only one friend who introduced me to DBing knows about what I'm doing.

I do not want "outside" influences.

[futureunknown]

Almost everyone in my life was (and still is) pushing for me to move on and leave my M behind. I really only have one key friend that is cautiously supportive of my DBing efforts. I agree completely with what others, and MWD in her book, said. Your friends and family want to see you stop hurting, as soon as possible. You have more of a long view on your situation, and you are potentially willing to endure more pain in the short term if you see a possible brighter future in the distance.

My situation is still in progress, but has had some encouraging developments lately. Since it began, a year and a half ago, I held firmly to the belief that if I could manage to find a way to save my M, and if my W did as much reflection as I did, our M would not only be better that it EVER would have been before, but it had the potential to be a truly great M.

If I had listened to my friends and family, I would have aggressively divorced my W last year, and now we'd be raising our kids as enemy co-parents.

Listen to your heart, and your gut, and your brain. Do what feels right to YOU.

[dday101798]

It's very common and explained in the books, your friends and family will side with you and feel it would be in your best intrest to just let it go, nature of the beast. No matter how much you point out your faults (sometimes even more severe than the S who's now walked), doesn't matter, just the way it works.

Only now after 6 months being back with my (x)W are some beginning to see that she is the person I love, no matter what. And it is my decision and my decision alone.

The largest irony, my cousin whom took me in when I lost everything is still the biggest opposition to us being back together. Yet, she stayed with her H through (atleast) 4 affairs? So, go figure.