FT was pretty good, solution focused and marriage friendly. W seemed to like him and I asked after if she was happy with the selection and she agreed we have another appt booked.
W publicly stated no contact with OM at FT appt and so far no evidence of contact. Gave W a low key birthday gift and it went okay.
FT further helped me with detachment, he did a good job of putting into words the work I've been doing on me. W seemed to appreciate his input - funny how the same words coming from me are ignored.
Still early days and it seems a lot of work in front of me. W poisoned ILs about me and that relationship looks damaged on top of everything else.
That's it for an update for now.
M 40 W 39 D 4 M 5 years Bomb dropped 08/09 In house separation
W poisoned ILs about me and that relationship looks damaged on top of everything else.
That's it for an update for now.
This is damage your WIFE needs to clean up on her own with them.
part of cleaning up an addiction is reparations. If you aren't willing to make reparations for the damage done, its not promising for any hope of recovery.
Your wife nees to talk to her family and be honest about her actions and how they drove her to poison your repuation...
Completely agree Allen I didn't do anything but try and protect my family. She owns cleaning up that mess.
Puppy - I'm not sure what to think about NC. There doesn't appear to be any intel at this time but I'm not completely accepting this on her word we know where that got me before. It came from her and it wasn't prompted by me in the session so maybe some truth to it. Not sure how to call that one.
M 40 W 39 D 4 M 5 years Bomb dropped 08/09 In house separation
I can't count how many spouses here were TOLD contact was over when it wasn't... or at some point it started up again and the WS "forgot to mention" that "chit chat" has happened "now and then"
Well,I take that back. I don't think I actually "told" my H that I had broken contact. He told me to do it, and as I recall I didn't say anything. But he was under the impression that I stopped (after he no longer found any emails).
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Ahhhh......the BRAIN. An area that is very difficult to control. My largest problem, actually. Not trying to be funny, even if some of you laughed, but what I meant was that is where my fantasy began and where it had to end.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
