wants papers filed

[Virtually_Handsome]

I think you need legal advice from a lawyer. At least here, the default timeline only applies if you don't contest anything. You don't have to just agree and accept things the way she wants them. The downside is that it could certainly cost you money. The upside is that it might buy you time.

I agree that she is almost certainly having an affair. But I don't know that you really need to be focusing on that angle yet. Until you are a better option, trying to stop it isn't going to help you, I think. I believe your time would be better spent focusing on yourself, presently.

[ShockedOne]

You have to trust me on this...she IS having an affair. When I accessed my W's email accounts I was blown away. Hundreds of pages of love notes and cybersex. You're probably right, she will screw up at some point, but it may be too late. For what, I don't know.

Oh and what is too extreme about tapping into her computer? She is totally disrupting your life and lying to your face
MICrazy

I took it a step further and bought CheckMate. Not a fun night when I used it to test, but it confirmed what I already thought I knew.
Shock

[david allen]

hey mycrazy
how did you access your wifes emails? I cant even get into her pc she has it locked and i dont know the pass word. Ofcourse i have my suspicions, she has everyone in the family convinced that there isnt anyone else, untill rescent she hasnt made any physical attempt to be away from home. Now that she has filed the D papers maybe she feels she can act on her E A I couldnt be more convinced that a E A has been going on for some time she opened up a yahoo acount besides her aol account and is very secretive about it. But ofcourse she denies that there is anything going on. The way people perceive her means everything to her she doesnt want to be perceived as the bad guy

[ShockedOne]

You can try to log in with a lost password. Just a thought. You will have to change her password in the process and will obviously be questioned by her. But you can always try it.

[MICrazy]

hey mycrazy
how did you access your wifes emails? I cant even get into her pc she has it locked and i dont know the pass word. Ofcourse i have my suspicions, she has everyone in the family convinced that there isnt anyone else, untill rescent she hasnt made any physical attempt to be away from home. Now that she has filed the D papers maybe she feels she can act on her E A I couldnt be more convinced that a E A has been going on for some time she opened up a yahoo acount besides her aol account and is very secretive about it. But ofcourse she denies that there is anything going on. The way people perceive her means everything to her she doesnt want to be perceived as the bad guy

My w thought she had me fooled into thinking she wasn't cheating on me. She freely gave me her password one night when she was out with a friend...I told her I wanted to surf the internet while I watched TV. My laptop is not working. If your w won't do that there is a linux run program that enables you to reset the windows password. Here's a how-to video: http://www.metacafe.com/watch/316013/hack_windows_vista/

Your wife may ask you if you've been messing with her computer when her password no longer works...

If it is a desktop, you can put a hardware keylogger between the keyboard and the computer itself. These are fairly cheap.

Hardware-wise if she has a laptop you can get this: http://www.keycarbon.com/products/keycarbon_laptop/overview/ Make sure the model number is compatible. It's costly though.

But you really need to expose her if people's perceptions of her are important.

Good luck...if you have any more questions let me know.

MICrazy

[ShockedOne]

I can't remember what keylogger I had used, but it was a free trial, and it gave me all the info I needed in the trial period. You have to be careful on them though, as you need it to be completely stealth. There are some very good ones out there with trial periods. That may be all you need, but you need access to the comp first. There are a few that say you can send them to computers with email too, don't know how that works, but it must load itself similar to a virus. Might be another option for you.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Just wait for your chance. May take a week, may take a month, but she'll forget to lock it down at some point.

She's obviously hiding contact.

There is a keylogger program -- eBlaster -- which includes a remote install feature, but your wife would have to click on the e-mail attachment for it to work. Worth a try!

Puppy

[david allen]

I cant believe im saying this but I feel that I cant wait untill she is gone I really felt that I wanted to save my marriage now I feel I cant wait untill its over. Her constant attitude towards me and our marriage is onmly a joke to her. I cant understand how a womAN CAN HAVE THAT KIND OF ATTITUDE TOWARDS ME WHEN ALL iVE DONE IS HONOR AND CHERISH MY SACRED VOW i MADE INFRONT OF HER AND GOD. i FIND MYSELF SITTING IN A BAR WHICH i CANT STAND JUST SO i DONT HAVE TO SIT IN THE SAME ROOM WITH HER AND LISTEN TO HER PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE LITTLE DIGGS. iM SO SICK OF DEALING WITH HER BULLSHIT iM REALLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO, ALL i DO KNOW IS i CANT WAIT UNTILL SHE GETS THE F___ OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!!! i UNDERSTAND THIS GOES AGAINST WHAT DIVORCE BUSTINGIS ALL ABOUT, BUT IM EXTREMELY FRUSTRATED AT THIS POINT.

[g450]

((david allen))

Man I feel so bad for you. I know exactly how you feel and I have to tell you that it was painfull for me to read your last post.

This brings back some bad memories for me.

Im guessing that you may have had a few to drink. I dont blame you. Its easy to do in this situation. I did that a few times and it did not help. Only numbs you for a little while and causes you to do something stupid. Trust me on this.

Only thing I can tell you is that things WILL get better for you. It may not seem that way right now but when you hit rock bottom there is only one way to go from there...up.

David I have been exactly where you are about four months ago. It WILL get better man. Trust me on this. Separation, divorce and then detachment were my friends and I did not even know it. I treated them like the enemy. They were in fact my savior.
She is doing you a favor David. You deserve better.

If she ever comes back then she will but either way you need to separate yourself emotionally from this as much as possible. Best way to do that is to start thinking about a new life and treat the present situation like it is inevitable because it sounds like it is.

I wish you the best David. I will pray for you.

[david allen]

thank you so much for the kind words!!! I always look forward to reading the posts, its just so said that were all here under such horible circumstances. Everyday I try to start my day with a smile and once in a while it will last all day Im looking forward to a little more consistancy, in that department.