Longest Post ever?

[soleil]

Let her tell you. Listen to her. I have a feeling you are going to find out a lot that you either suspected or have been fearing but she will confirm it (OM)...

[BigJake]

I already know more than she thinks I do. I don't think I can be too surprised at this point.

new text from W

"never mind,I don't think I'm ready for this."

[CityGirl]

See, all she was doing was trying to get you to respond and when you didn't she backed down and gave her standard "never mind" in hopes you would beg her to talk.

Ignore her.

[soleil]

^ CG is right. Ignore her. She will think "Why doesn't he want to know?"

[BigJake]

This is my reply.

OK? If you got up enough nerve to send that, then I think ur more ready then you think.

She agreed. Her biggest fear is that I will tell people what she tells me.

So tonight is the night.

She said this is the hard for me to do. I said if it was easy everybody would do it.

She's freaking out a little.

[BobbiJo]

Just my 2 cents: If she continues to back pedal, do not put pressure on her in any way. I think the only way for things to work in a lot of these situations is when the walk-away takes the initiative. My ex hemmed and hawed and I had to pull things out of him. In hindsight I would not have pushed as his reluctance showed me he was not really that interested...

[soleil]

^ ITA with the "no pressure" thing. And let her talk all she wants.

[BigJake]

BobbiJo, I'm prepared for that. I also agree putting pressure on her if she truly isn't ready will just make it worse.

For the first time in our relationship she is willing to tell me the truth. This is a big deal. I hope she can actually do it. Lucky for me I know everything. If she tries to tell me just enough to get me off her back she has another thing coming.

[BobbiJo]

It is actually good that you have a lot of info up front. That way you will be able to tell if she is giving you just enough to try and hold your attention or if she is truly remorseful....

[BigJake]

What do I say when she asks about the imaginary OW? She will want details from me if she is giving me details. Do i tell her it was all B.S.?

She will feel like I tricked her. That would not be good.

BTW, I am not going to let her come back because of this. This is only the first step. I'm also not going to give in to sex:(