WAW has moved to inlaws house a couple days ago "to get some space..she is exhausted" and isn't sure where this will lead. Not the first time we have been through this. We were separated in the same manner 2 yrs ago for abt 10 months. Using DB, counseling and hard work, we got back together. Unfortunately it seems we slipped in to old patterns.
Anyway - now she says "we need to discuss finanaces" and that she doesn't think she should have to foot half the bill for the household stuff. (We have a joint acct for house pmt, utils, cable, etc. and the rest is separated....this came out of the last trip through this).
I think that she should pay for half of the "fixed dwelling expenses" (look at it as protecting her investment) plus at least some portion of the utilities. I don't disagree with paying for cable/phone since I use them and she isn't currently.
I should have been more specific in my request. One of the things I am not good with is boundaries. I need to know what to say to her that sets the boundary for what I am comfortable with....but without slamming a door shut. At this point I am still unsure about standing or leaving, so I am operating as a stander.
"I think it is only fair that you pay (all of what I said)". Or do I simply say "We each need to pay (blah)"
What if she disagrees? What is the right thing to say?
