I posted this on another thread but figured a copy and paste here would be a good update on my stitch.
I have gotten to the place I think you would like to be at. I am a peace with the ending of my marriage. I really do not think about my wife at all. Life right now is peaceful. It bothered me a bit 2 weeks ago. But right now. It does not. I do not miss her. Nor do I think of her physically or emotionly any more.
When I talk about her to my MOM or close friends its all very factual and past tense. No present or future thoughts about her. I do not say anything bad about her. It's weird I guess. Its like she is no longer important in my life. Last week when I was down due to the cold, it was very easy to work myself out of it.
When I look at a picture of her, I think of that moment and smile but there is no sigh or regret. I have really been enjoying new friendships, and I have gone out on a few dates. Spent quality time alone. I am not afraid of having nothing to do.
We still have a few things to work out with the selling of the house. But thats it. I guess I am a WAS now as well. It does not matter if we ever work this out. As I have worked on myself and I have forgiven myself. The need to forgive her is not that important. For I realize now that its is somthing that she must do herself. I am not carrying any guilt or regrets.
Detachment is very powerful. I hope you get here one day my friend.
Last edited by cutterbug; 11/16/0907:44 PM. Reason: its peace not piece
Well puppy I know the future holds the future. Helping others has really helped my own life. The last 5 months have been a different time. I look forward to seeing the next 5 months.
I posted this on another thread but figured a copy and paste here would be a good update on my stitch.
I have gotten to the place I think you would like to be at. I am a peace with the ending of my marriage. I really do not think about my wife at all. Life right now is peaceful. It bothered me a bit 2 weeks ago. But right now. It does not. I do not miss her. Nor do I think of her physically or emotionly any more. When I talk about her to my MOM or close friends its all very factual and past tense. No present or future thoughts about her. I do not say anything bad about her. It's weird I guess. Its like she is no longer important in my life. Last week when I was down due to the cold, it was very easy to work myself out of it.
When I look at a picture of her, I think of that moment and smile but there is no sigh or regret. I have really been enjoying new friendships, and I have gone out on a few dates. Spent quality time alone. I am not afraid of having nothing to do.
We still have a few things to work out with the selling of the house. But thats it. I guess I am a WAS now as well. It does not matter if we ever work this out. As I have worked on myself and I have forgiven myself. The need to forgive her is not that important. For I realize now that its is somthing that she must do herself. I am not carrying any guilt or regrets.
Detachment is very powerful. I hope you get here one day my friend.
You've basically just described my state of mind, though I am surprised about recent horrendous allegations (Not Taking Them Personally)and apparent attempts to create rifts in blended family (though I am trying not to make any assumptions.)
Mo dating yet, though.
Good place to (finally) be, isn't it?
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
Sexy lady panties... Hmmm... Would not a teddy be better...
No, I think this is going too far. If she takes them she may try to use them as evidence of infidelity on your part. The idea is to let her assume what she wants without spelling things out exactly.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
No, I think this is going too far. If she takes them she may try to use them as evidence of infidelity on your part. The idea is to let her assume what she wants without spelling things out exactly.
I agree.
Do you really want to win your wife back by deceiving her? There is one person on these forums who tried something similar; her husband called her bluff, and she ended up more miserable than before.
It's one thing to GAL and work on yourself and let things work out as they will; it's another to be deceitful. If it backfires, you do far more damage to your cause because she has good reason to believe that the work you are doing is shallow and manipulative.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
I am going out on a date with a friend who has travelled the world and lives a completely different lifesytle than me. I am looking forward to a night of conversation and good food.
For those who choose not to date. This is what your missing out on. You get to meet up with friends. Do enjoyable activities and have a good night of conversation. Nowhere here is anything that is wrong. Your expations are only to enjoy good company, good conversation and good food.
Why not treat yourself to living a life? I know I am worth it. I believe in myself. I know I have self-worth. I know that I am want to share my moments of my life with people who are willing to share their moments as well.
This is dating. No where here is an EA or PA.
On a side note. I also decided that I have survived the worst year of my life. So I am buying a new pair of speakers.
It was ment as a joke.