When is it time to give up? What if you just can not do it? I have been only been in 3 relationships in my entire life where I have said the L word. My ex fiancee is without question the best woman that I have ever encounter in my life. We lived together for over 2 years and my 6 year old D was closer to her than her real M. I am not sure I can let go. I miss her not just daily but hourly, I was more complete in my world than I ever have been in my life. When should I give up?? When?
Hey Mongoose. Hang in there. As Dudess says above, what's happening - give us some background?
I miss my WAH by the second of each and every day. If I can do this and hold my head above the drowning line, then so can you. Give us a bit more to work off .... BREATHE deeply and don't panic just yet.
Let us give you our take on things but first, you need to tell as what's going on - how old are you both, how long have you been together, what caused your relationship to break down??
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
I met a woman online and we stayed together for over 2 years. During that time I would chat, text and e-mail female friends of mine. I NEVER cheated but it did cause problems. In on situation a girl, angry at me for not being with, contact my ex and told her I was with her. Ex believed me but not really. Shortly after that I proposed to her. We had our moments but way more good than bad. We lived together with her 2 sons and my little girl who was there 505 of the time. She was unhappy in some of the jobs she had so I helped her start a boutique and I am glad I did because it has made her happy. When she shut down her furniture store, after owning it for 8 years it really hurt her. I thought I was being a good man. Anyway, she has never trusted nor believed that I was not connecting with people behind her back. Due the fact that she was starting a new business I did not see her a lot nor my little girl we missed her and I wanted more time with her. I did not handle it right I got resentful of anything that took time away from us. We were going to take a cruise to try to have our first time alone together as couple away from everything but we broke up and she took her son instead. The last month I was in the house, after they got back, I let all fear of being hurt, or losing her, resent go and just enjoyed her as much as good I wanted to be remembered for that. I was not my intent to get her back or manipulate her but I did want her to remember why she loved me. Anyway, I started trying to find a place to move out. One of the places I looked the woman who wanted to rent the room to me liked me. In fact she asked a friend if he had a room to rent to help me. She told this friend that she was interested in me and wanted to date me. The friend turn out to be someone both me and my ex know. He told my ex and it got taken out of context that I was dating. Even though we broke up already she was upset because I had not left the house. The girl told her and explained to me she never said we were dating but that she liked me and wanted to date me. I told her I was not interested in her in that way at all and that I was still very much IN love with my ex. Well it was bad timing because she was just starting to miss and had thought about changing her mind. Now the latest that happened yesterday. A women who had told my ex we had been together over 2 years ago contacted her through facebook and told her that I was with her and that an e-mail that was sent to my ex had come from me not her. I e-mailed this woman on facebook and got a reply back that just said PAYBACK in big words. So instead of being remembered for all the good things, all the loving things I tried to do I am being remembered for being unfaithful when I wasn't. I even offered to take a lie detector test from a service I found online. I still love her very, very much and she has a right to be suspicious but once I put that ring on her finger I have not done anything. I have NEVER, EVER cheated on her. I have not kissed anyone, hugged anyone outside of friendship, had sex, felt up, touched no one. However my conduct ruined the most valuable thing in a relationship trust. I can never get that back. Truth be told it has been the worst ever the last 48 hours. If I could push a button and go to sleep and painlessly never wake up I would. Don't know what to do but go through the motions until it stops hurting. Worse thing is I know I hurt her far worse than I am hurting and she does not deserve. She is great. Intelligent, independent, strong, beautiful, fantastic lover, giving, the whole nine yards. I miss horribly. every minute of every hour of every day.
Thanks Dudess and EN for responding. I have been on the forums a lot but I am not sure it is working. I am feeling like there is no reason to get up anymore. I am in the gym relentlessly and I just don't care about any of it anymore. Everything, I see, I watch, people I know, everything reminds me of how much I miss her and want her back in my life. Even the idea of dating is horrid because it would be like settling. I am truly not sure I am going to make it especially with the upcoming holidays. Giving up has to meanings now for me. Giving up on getting her back and giving up on it all.
