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ALJ Offline
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Hi MaryEL

It's good to hear that you have a plan and you are going to stick with it. Way to go!! What are you going to take up in college? Signing up for a personal trainer at the gym is a great idea also. Your duff will be buff in no time smile. You are really moving in the right direction with GAL.

I have signed up for school also. I am going to be a certified Medical Biller and Coder. Classes start in September and I am really excited to be getting back into the swing of things. Going to school has always been a favorite of mine. Now if I could just get that excited about getting my butt to the gym and utilizing that gym membership that I am paying for smile.

We are on our way!!

ALJ


Me:34
H:34
D:7
D:6
D:3
T:20years
M:10years
Bomb: Feburary 2009
Separated: May 2009
EA confirmed March 2010
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,501
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Ooh Mary, thats so exciting! What classes did you sign up for? Are you enrolled in a certain program, or just taking personal interest classes?

I think that as you detach you will feel better, well, I know that you will. Hes the one that makes you sad, so if you dont come into contact with him, you will think of him less, and as you think of him less, your emotional ups and downs will slow down. What I mean is that the less you find yourself immersed in your situation, the less you will think about it.

Oh, and I wanted to suggest a book for you, its called Hope for the Seperated, Wounded Marriages can be Healed, by Gary Chapman.


I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
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MaryEL Offline OP
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Bluerain and Alj,
thanks for the kudos! I felt great yesterday when I got home.. of course I looked at my class schedule today and choked. lol..
I am going for my BA in business management. I have an AA but never went back.. got too involved in my life and let it lead me instead of the other way around. the choking I did was because I have to have a foreign language and I signed up for spanish.. I flunked it in HS and Im usually an easy A kinda student... but I know I need to learn it soo.. I will try hard!

ALJ.. I did medical office management and billing for years before getting into real estate. I loved it. I never took classes just kinda stumbled my way up the ladder, but not having the actual certifications etc did hinder me at times.. so GOOD FOR YOU!! I know you can do it!!

Im off to my friends for a girls weekend and am looking forward to it.. I will come home fresh and next week will be the continuation of the NEW ME!!

Have a great weekend all!


M - 45 1st marriage H - 45 2nd M -T - 14 yrs M - 13 yrs
S - due to job location since 1/08
B - 7/6/2009 EA revealed -9/3/2009 began 6/09 E/A end 9/09
piercing: since 10/09 long distance
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lol on the easy A. Good luck with that! I have found some really good websites for cheaper books this semester, let me know if you want the site names.

I tried to take a spanish, Ill do the humanities instead! It was awful! But, I think that thats due more to my personality. Some of the students took right to it.

Maybe your H will give you some of his GI bill? Mine has offered, but hes kind of a slacker, so I dont know that he will ever get around to registering for it.

I hope that your weekend goes GREAT! Have a bunch of fun and set your new life off right!


I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
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MaryEL Offline OP
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bluerain,
thanks for the info and I will take you up on the website info for books.. please share them when you have time.

I had a great weekend, simple but fun. Rode a bike for over 3 miles.. havent done that in ages.. good times with some girlfriends and some serious conversation from one of their very caring and sweet husbands... didnt like the facts he shared but it was a good conversation.. (MEN!!)lol

My H is planning to use his GI bill for his masters.. he is currently getting his bachelors as well.. but if he will stay married to me for the next 1.5 yrs, there are 2 programs here I can use for the cost of classes... so Im going to PUNT and hope for the best. worse case I have a high credit card when I am done... it will still be 1/2 of what he has recently added to his... and a lot more productive!!!!

Well I hope everyone had a great weekend!!! Im going to get ready for my full week and make sure my HAPPY is rested and ready to roar!!


M - 45 1st marriage H - 45 2nd M -T - 14 yrs M - 13 yrs
S - due to job location since 1/08
B - 7/6/2009 EA revealed -9/3/2009 began 6/09 E/A end 9/09
piercing: since 10/09 long distance
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,501
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Oh, hey you should really check out mycaa its a program through the DOD that can give up to 6000 in tuition assistance!

The website I go to is called alibris, theres also cheapbooks.com and you can actually rent some books. ebay, amazon.com and barnes and noble have some really good deals. I just got the rest of my books for this semester, 800! And I got almost all used books.

I think that going into debt for school is totally worthwhile! A much better investment than a MLC!

I talked to a lawyer who thought that I actually had a good chance of getting my H to pay for my schooling, or at least giving me a pretty penny for alimony since I followed him and his career around.


I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
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MaryEL Offline OP
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Bluerain, yes.. the Mycaa is what I am using to start, but they dont cover books. then If still M I can use another program for the last 30 hrs of my bachelors that will cover book.

I will look at the sites for books you have given! Thanks much!!

I see your H is visiting in Sept.. I hope that goes well.. I have looked for your thread and see by your many posts that you are very busy being helpful to so many on this site, but havent seen your personal posts. Please share a link as I would love to keep abreast of that smile

I have had a buzy few days and will post more later!


M - 45 1st marriage H - 45 2nd M -T - 14 yrs M - 13 yrs
S - due to job location since 1/08
B - 7/6/2009 EA revealed -9/3/2009 began 6/09 E/A end 9/09
piercing: since 10/09 long distance
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,501
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Im not allowed to use the Mycaa. Grr. Its not extended to Coast Guard. But... I am glad that you can use it, its got to be so helpful!

Im trying to not have big expectations for the visit, Im not sure what the point of the visit is.

Heres a link to my thread:

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1734119&page=18


I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
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MaryEL Offline OP
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Bluerain,
I will read your thread this weekend.. lots of time has passed many pages to read:).

I found out yesterday that my h did hire an atty and evidently is eager for me not to be in the house when he gets back in Oct. so eager that although he had said he would delay filing until he came back from his next deployment (jan-June) he has requested that the atty file so that he may file an order to get me out of the house so he can live here. ARGH

I am fine living together, but for some reason he is not. Really burst my happy bubble that I had formed from registering for school, starting a work out plan and not smoking.

I have decided for the time being I will only do what makes me happy. I dont want to deal with lawyers and paperwork and all of that crap.. so he can.. I am sure at some point I will have to take my head out of the sand, but I have been the go getter and problem solver and follow thru person for the last 13 years.. I quit... at least for the weekend smile
unfortunately I dont think I can do much about it.. but I will continue to focus on what I can do.. for me... and try my best to stay sane thru this mess..

Happy friday to all!


M - 45 1st marriage H - 45 2nd M -T - 14 yrs M - 13 yrs
S - due to job location since 1/08
B - 7/6/2009 EA revealed -9/3/2009 began 6/09 E/A end 9/09
piercing: since 10/09 long distance
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,501
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Posts: 1,501
Make sure that you keep getting your allotments. That way, even if you arent living in the house, he will still be paying a lot of your costs of living! Hes getting that dependents pay to support you, not fund his MLC!


I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
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