Long story short. I was put on medication awhile back that messed with my head big time. I met & married my husband before ending my previous relationship. In which time I still saw both of them. When they found out I went back to the previous bc I am pregnant and think he is the father. I finally got off the medication and it's taken me a while to get back to normal. I now realize that it is my husband, not the previous boyfriend that I love. Is there any hope of fixing things with my husband?
Hi Mindy and welcome aboard. How long have you been off the medication? Have you told your H the same thing that you've told us? How long have you been M? The more information you give us, the better we can understand your story.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Hi Mindy and welcome aboard. How long have you been off the medication? Have you told your H the same thing that you've told us? How long have you been M? The more information you give us, the better we can understand your story.
My advice is still the same... seek a professional therapist who is pro-marriage who will work with both you and your husband. The answer to your question is going to be one your husband has to answer.
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
It's a little hard to seek a therapist with him. I in our home state and he is in the neighboring state for his job. (military)
Ask him if he'd be willing to work on the M. If so you are willing to do what it takes to get you and he to a therapist - because however you feel now I guarantee you have no idea how badly he is probably hurt inside if he really loved you.
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
Mindy, I dont know your full story, but I definately understand the distance thing, I am in the south and my husband is in the north due to military station. I am thinking if you are having postive interaction with him you could go and visit? I dont have that option. Mine is angry and DONE so I know if I make the trip he would most likely not even want to see me.. and would be able to make sure he did not.. but if it is an option for you.. Go for it.. Tell him you love him!!
M - 45 1st marriage H - 45 2nd M -T - 14 yrs M - 13 yrs S - due to job location since 1/08 B - 7/6/2009 EA revealed -9/3/2009 began 6/09 E/A end 9/09 piercing: since 10/09 long distance
- I really wish I could visit him. It's not really a possibility at this immediate time.
- I know he is still hurt even though he denies it by his behavior. He waivers a lot on being nice and being completely stubborn when I mention working on anything.
well from what I have been reading on here ( I am new) it seems like TIME heals all.. ( yes I am not loving all of the TIME on my hands..lol) but in a few months you will know if the baby is his.. so try so hard to focus on getting ready to bring that beautiful child into this world... work on finding the best you.. so you will be ready for this baby... and then when you find out who the father is.. you will have a better understanding of how to handle thing.. GOOD LUCK..:)
M - 45 1st marriage H - 45 2nd M -T - 14 yrs M - 13 yrs S - due to job location since 1/08 B - 7/6/2009 EA revealed -9/3/2009 began 6/09 E/A end 9/09 piercing: since 10/09 long distance
That part I am always working on. I realized it was a mistake to go back to someone I didn't love just bc I am pregnant. It will only make me, him, and eventually the child unhappy. I want to be with him bc I know that's what makes me happy.
That part I am always working on. I realized it was a mistake to go back to someone I didn't love just bc I am pregnant. It will only make me, him, and eventually the child unhappy. I want to be with him bc I know that's what makes me happy.
One of the most important things in life I've learned is that nobody makes you happy if you aren't happy with yourself.
Get there first.
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
