It has been almost a year since I have posted on this site. My last thread was in the "separated” section but I think it makes more sense for me to post here now. Our divorce isn’t quite final but is in the works and is definitely going to happen.
After going through the affair H had, losing the baby after he looked me in the face everyday telling me he hoped I would lose it and dealing with all his mental abuse I have no part of me that wants any part of him anymore. I feel stronger now than I ever was with him. I received a huge promotion at work, made new friends, found a nice condo and was so happy when I realized I could take care of myself. H on the other hand has turned into this pathetic person and wants me back now that I am strong and confident again. He still calls/texts talking about how much he misses me and even asks for sex. I’m not completely cold hearted, I do still care about him, but I just don’t want to associate myself with the whole mess anymore. He wants to maintain a friendship with me but is that even possible?
Do I seem wrong for not wanting to go back to him now when that’s what I fought for and wanted for so long?
Also, do you think I am ready to start dating? It has been over a year now since the affair/separation.
Thanks for any help! -Nikki
M: 25, H: 29 T: 4 years M: 11 months Bomb (ILYBNILWY): 7/11/08 Found out about OW: 7/12/08 Seperated but living together
He wants to maintain a friendship with me but is that even possible?
From what you say, it sounds like he really wants more than friendship. If you really have no interest in reconciling with him, I don't think it would be the kind thing to do at least not now.
Quote:
Do I seem wrong for not wanting to go back to him now when that’s what I fought for and wanted for so long?
Not at all. He had an A and mentally abused you, it sounds like really cruel to you. I thing marriage is important, but I think there's some things like abuse or drugs, etc. that change the sitch and make decisions different than if that's not involved. Karen
