lol, tell your MIL that you would never keep your kids from their Gramma. Maybe its a little low, and sort of game playing, but really, thats kind of lame for your W to use the kids to manipulate her mom.
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
W was upset about my MIL drinking so much. but of course like alot of WAS the spouse who was left (me in this case) gets blammed for everything... W claims I wanted to keep MIL away from the kids. and well blames me for all her troubles and mistakes.
I did tell MIL that she could see the kids and that since I have placment W can't really keep her from her grand kids
well i have not contacted W and she has not contacted me.. although it has not been very long at all, I just want the support and ideas from you guys/gals
I think this might be best IDK. from other people Ive talked to they said going your own way is best. it allows you to heal and in a way gets them to think about what they had/are missing out on.
it almost seems like her wanting to be friends just had to be her controling the situation and if i stick to this I will have shown her i made up my mind and well look like im done. and if there is anything left in her for me she will come around on her own.
ive been told it takes months befor it gets better where you wont find yourself constantly thinking about the W but you will never stop being reminded
I have been seperated for almost 15 months. Its been a long road, and you start thinking less and less about them. But its true, you shared your life with this person, but I think that coming on here helped me a lot.
I would recommend that you continue GALing, maybe even ramp it up a some for a little bit. Do something nice for yourself! Do you have nice sheets on your bed? I know that its girlie, but it did me good! I got a whole new bed set, nothing on my bed, including the mattress, has ever been touched by H. It was good for me. Is there something else you could do for yourself? New seat covers for the truck, or something?
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
yeah, i was thinking of doing something like that. ive been finishing the new room "we" had planned. then i was thinking maybe something for myself but idk what yet. yeah i got new sheets right away. maybe just moving out of the old bedroom and into the new room will help.
Is your H still trying? I can say I dont feel as hurt anymore! still hurt but not the big punch in the gut like befor
Sometimes he is. He still doesnt know, having doubts, is confused and blah blah blah. Which I think is special since he was the one with a 22 year old GF! grumble grumble.
Im trying to respect how confused he is, and how he got to the point where he was so unhappy he sought out another person... but really, Im having a hard time seperating that from enabling him, the A is over, but still... For now, Im trying to be patient. Im not positive that I could forgive him and actually want him back. He lives in Va and I live in Ak, so Im a little nervous about if we are going to be able to make progress.
I think that the pain wearing off is just time healing your wounds. Its what we all need!
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
I think right now im just not sure if my breaking all contact was the right move.
she wanted to be friends but it seemed like she just wanted to control me. and keep me on "hold"(when she calls and texts i should write text back) she clearly missed me but not enough or maybe in the right way IDK (that answer is only in her)
should I keep my distance and no contact as much as possiable like I have been since last wed? or should i open the lines of communications soon and go back to being nice and letting her give mixed signals?
on a side note i noticed the agreement she sighned had a error and said she had to meet me at my county sherrifs dept. for all exchanges. LOL
I am struggling with the mixed signals I am getting. WAW that is still here gives me some openings. I have to resist getting into a conversation. We need to get to the point where she wants to talk. Patience.
She sent a text on my way to work saying she is hurt I can't talk to her. She said she does not understand why I don't want to befriends if she does not want to get back togeather. Then she goes on to say she thought we were doing good as friends And now she is confused
Kinda pisses me off she clearly never read my text telling her I had wanted to be friends I just wanted space for awhile.
I never responded I'm not sure if I should or not or really what I should do at all
You should go ask puppy to come over and check out your thread. Maybe you should tell her again.
I dont want to be my H's friend. If he doesnt want to fix what he did, I dont want to be his friend. My friends are people who are accountable for their mistakes. They dont do the things that he did.
How about telling her that you understand that she is hurt. But you dont feel like you are ready to talk to her just yet. I would go look at other threads and see how other people have dealt with this.
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
