One more positive sign from W this weekend. W apologized for getting us turned around on directions taking S to camp. "I'm so sorry."Seems little, but this is the 1st apology she has made in 15 yrs of being together. I couldn't believe my ears.
Doesn't seem little at all! "Watch for changes"? Man, that's a significant one.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
I thought that was pretty big as well, since it has NEVER happened before. She was very sincere when she said it. I just told her no big deal, probably bad directions.
Had a good evening. Watched another Harry Potter film to prepare for the new one coming out on Wednesday. My W is more into those than I, but we are going to the new film on Wednesday, so I wanted to understand the story. So, we have been watching the series the last few days.
I do not want to get my hopes up, even with what appear to be more positive signs. Just going to stick with what I have been doing and add in more "Acts of Service" for her, without pursuing. It occured to me over the weekend that W's LL is "Acts of Svc." and she seems in her best moods when I have done something to help her accomplish a chore/task/whatever.
At the same time, I'm still trying to keep my distance. Such a fine line sometimes, but I am getting more familiar with it.
Gima, Good for you. I watched 1/2 of Jim Carrey's Yes Man tonight. Glad I didn't see it 6 weeks ago when all I was doing was wallowing. Still, it had me wondering: Was this written just for me?
What'd you think of Love Languages, Gima? I haven't gotten around to that one.
Your thoughts on my Script post that I just finished? Would love your take when you have time.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
I think your script is good - just posted. Just be ready for possible fireworks when you tell her you aren't going to a mediator.
Haven't yet seen Yes Man, but want to.
I thought LL was very helpful. Short read. Helped me understand how to show my W love. Basically breaks down the 5 LL's. Helps me see how W tried to show me love through her "language" which wasn't mine. Definitely recommend it.
Gonna throw my 2 cents at the questions you asked.
1. Yes, and in my case when you least expect it. My W was full steam ahead with D and was done. After first visit with mediator she went from D to LS. After the next visit that changed to i'm having second thoughts. After the last visit she went to wanting to try to work things out to now being convinced we can work things out. To say I was shocked by all this is the understatement of the year.
2. I think pride and not knowing how can play into it. W has told me that when her mind changed it shocked her and confused her as to how it had changed. She also said that a big piece of the confusion was how she had been so cold and convinced that we were done for the previous 6 months. She needed to make sure the new feelings were real.
Don't know if that answered your questions but hope it helps some.
That did answer my questions. Thanks for the response.
As to the first question, I think the WAS does, at some point in most cases, realize they have made a mistake.
On question 2, you bring up something I had not realized - that if the WAS changes their mind, they may not trust their feelings to work on M. If they doubted their feelings to leave, why should we expect them to trust their feelings to return? Very good point.
and may the Lord's profound peace color your day.