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#1794094 07/03/09 05:02 PM
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Orich Offline OP
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My old thread was locked, I wanted to reply to steady:
Thanks for pointing that out and trying to keep me on track. You are right, most of the time I am doing things for W. I will try harder to make my GALs for me.


Me-40
W-41
Together-10
M-8
S-6
S-4
Bomb 5/08
Bomb 10/08
Thought things were better, was wrong.
Still living together
Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,478
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Orich, my heart aches for you and your children. I just don't get it and I probably never will.

I will never fathom how a mother can tear up her family and think, "Oh, well, no biggie...."

Are all of these M's broken because there is substance issuse or physical abuse? I think not. It's just selfishness.

Whaaaaa!!!! H ignores me!! So? What are you doing to make him ignore you?

Whaaaaa!!!!! I never really wanted kids.....So? Then why on earth did you have them?

Oh, well. The kids will adapt quite nicely.....NOT!!!

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Orich Offline OP
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Up until recently, W and I have been getting along fine, like good friends. Lately, however, she has been very snippy. She barely talks to me at all now, and when she does it is short, and only when necessary. She also has been finding things wrong to complain about. I didn't move my car soon enough, or I forgot the bagels at the food store, etc. Today was the most frustrating. She always used to comment that when we got together with her sister and her kids on a Saturday that she thought it was bad that her sister's husband didn't go and stayed home to work around the house. She was always glad that I went. So, it would be me, W, her sister, our boys and her sister's girls going to parks, the beach, etc. Today she was going to the beach with her sister. She said to me that I didn't have to go, that it would just be her sister and daughters. I said that her husband isn't going again, huh? She replied with "no, he is staying home doing husband things around the house."
So now he is a good husband staying home to do house stuff and I am the bad one for wanting to go do family stuff. I even packed the car for her, and of course it wasn't done right.
I just don't get it.


Me-40
W-41
Together-10
M-8
S-6
S-4
Bomb 5/08
Bomb 10/08
Thought things were better, was wrong.
Still living together
Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
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KL,

Wish you could sit down and slap some sense into my W's head!!!


Me 43, S11, D7
M13
Bomb 4/20/09
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Orich Offline OP
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I was doing really good for a
little while there. W is at a party with her family (who still don't know by the way) and I am at my parents with the kids. All of a sudden just now I got very sad. Trying to shake it.


Me-40
W-41
Together-10
M-8
S-6
S-4
Bomb 5/08
Bomb 10/08
Thought things were better, was wrong.
Still living together
Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 873
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Just focus on what you have Orich. Enjoy the children and family. We all get that from time to time. I am out of town by myself, and have been getting that on and off all day long. Hang in there, hopefully it will ease and get easier with time for you.


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Orich Offline OP
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Thanx for the encouragement. I know when it gets dark and the boys are watching fireworks it will be a good distraction. I spoke to w a few minutes ago, she called to check on the boys. Ot was wired talking to her when she should be here.


Me-40
W-41
Together-10
M-8
S-6
S-4
Bomb 5/08
Bomb 10/08
Thought things were better, was wrong.
Still living together
Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 873
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Offline
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Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 873
I know exactly what you mean. I have gotten plenty of those late night phone calls saying "I am on my way home" when W should already be home. The talks today, we are both out of town in opposite directions, no reason we wouldn't have normally been together. It sucks, BAD. But stay strong and positive and enjoy the kids. They are at the age that they should easily distract you.


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Orich Offline OP
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Knowing that she says she is done, and this being the first holiday we are apart really makes me feel like it really is over. Fireworks should be starting soon. Keep plugging on!


Me-40
W-41
Together-10
M-8
S-6
S-4
Bomb 5/08
Bomb 10/08
Thought things were better, was wrong.
Still living together
Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 603
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Sorry for you Orich! You have made such great strides since all your DBing started! Your W`s problem is she hasn`t noticed. No matter what the outcome is you can still keep your great changes.

Anyway, I think our WAS`s have a big problem really making up their minds about M. Don`t look too much at her response to things(yeah, I know easier said than done!) but be thrilled for yourself at the fun you`re having with the kids and the changes you`ve made for yourself. Make sure you`ve a few good people around you can go have a fun sociable time with when ever you need to. It`sll keep you head out of this difficult DB world.

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