This is my first post. I have been married 15 years and my wife and I are in divorce proceedings. We have a final hearing date set for the 15th of July.I really dont want the divorce. Today I snt her a text explaining the fact that I thought are divorce was a big mistake. I told her I loved her and missed her and the kids. I didnt even get a response back from her! We have had alot of problems but I am very faithful and believe God can bring us back together. My problem is I cant deal with the fact that she is moving forward and seems to be over everything. I could really use some advice on how to go about my daily life and what I should do and not do to win her back. I do not argue with her or ever get mad. Are relationship seems very distant and cold. I moved out two weeks ago. If she is over everything why does she still have all of our family photos still up in our house and our wedding pictures as well. I really want things to work out and Im in prayer daily. I feel God is working in my life and is bringing me closer to that man he wants me to be and not the man I used to be. Obviously, Im here as before I would not. I hurt like you all probably have or do and just want some advice on how I should go about in dealing with whole situation. Please know that Im completely dedicated to working on this and myself in order for her to see the man she was supposed to have. Is there any hope? please help!
Sorry to hear this. You have come to a good place. It will help if you give some more details. What are some things that came before this divorce proceedings? Why did you move out? What has happened before your text today in terms of your discussions on your relationship?
I am sure you are in a lot of hurt, but there is a lot of great power here to tap into. Keep reading and posting.
H35 W34 S4 | T-10 yrs M-6 yrs WAW said M over 04/09 | Living separate since 09/09 Thread #1 Thread #2 Thread #3
First we didnt know eacr very long when we got married. Only about 2.5 months. I met my wife through work and we started going to lunch.We became close over talking to one another but I was still close to a girl I had been dating. I believed my wife was the one so I broke off the relationship with the other girl.We married soon after eloping to Tennessee to Gatlinburg. My wife had a 6 yr old son and I was smitten with her. A month after we got married my mom was murdered and I became very distraught over it. I ddnt feel my wife was very supportive. She showed little emotion about it and I constantly struggled. I ran into exfriend and she griefed over my mom very emotionally in front me. We talked about it and she said if I ever need to talk she was a good listener. I made the mistake of getting to talk to her about it and not my wife. I ended up sleeping with her twice and realized I already fell into a trap. I immediately broke off with her and exlained that it was wrong. She mailed a ltr my house 4 months later and my wife opened it.That wsas 14 years ago. My wife is very controlling anyway, are bdrm life was always boring even bf any trble happened. I left because I went to counceling to try and get close to her but she wouldnt go. I nvr talked to exfriend since and belief in my heart that this has ruined us. I really would like to know how I can convince my wife that I still love her. I pray daily and want more than anything for my mariage to work. What are these steps everyone talks about and the dos and donts in getting them back. I feel if I change and tell her how much she means to me then it should work. Write me back
Sorry you are in your sitch. You have found a great place for support.
Have you read Divorce Remedy? If not go buy a copy ASAP and read it. The consensus is NOT to share the information in the book with spouse. This is your tool to get the relationship back on track.
I have many books that were helpful to me listed on the first post of my thread.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
I read this helped! Im in counceling and he is a christian. I dont feel my wife has ever forgiven me. Do I tell her I still love or not? Does dhe even want to hear this at this point? It is all confusing and all I want to do is make it right! Last night my wife said the air conditioner in the house was going to have to be replaced at a cost of about 4000 I know there is alot of work involved do the price doent sound outrageous. Dhe wants me to pay have even though Im not there. I said we could talk about it. How do you deal with pull away attitude? I really hate this. I had my amiled forwarded and she is mad about this! I think she thinks Im going to throw something of hers out! I would never do this. In favt Ive havent even recievd any of her m
Show her you love her in your actions. Actions speak louder than words. Respect her choices.
Love is an action word. Love = patience and kindness. Love = empathy and understanding.
To make it right, just work on YOU. Put the relationship on hold.
You might try saying "I am sorry the air is not working, what are you going to do about it?"
As far as the pulling away, Mirror her. I found that pulling away faster than her stopped her from pulling away farther. This is hard to do but works. People want what they cant have. People like people who are like them.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Your comment is uncalled for! When people hurt you dont kick them when there down! I dont appreciate your lack of concern! I need positive comments not negative.
