My advice is to listen to your lawyer!!! (I didn't and gave in on too many things! Especially toward the end I just wanted a settlement so I wouldn't hate my exH. A year down the road I can see I sold myself short! However, my ex and I have a decent relationship now so maybe I did the right thing).
I hope you can get in touch with your lawyer soon. It stinks to play that phone tag. I'm sure she'll be able to help you out a lot on the business part of it. From what I remember, you may not have worked there, but your income helped build it. I don't recall you saying anything about OW having put any of her own pay back into the business so although she works there, she's just an employee not an investor. That's just how I see it.
Maybe I'm wrong, but I'd see the fact that your girls aren't minors as a blessing. I wouldn't think that he could really use the kids against you, other than helping to pay for college. How old are OW's kids? I say good luck to your H with all that! You know that once things are settled with you and your H
Well, again, I'll email you soon. Take care & have a great day.
Big hugs to you wonderful lady!!
SueS
ME: 42, H: 42, D6 Together: 18 yrs. Married: 15 yrs. Attended Retrouvaille - December 2009 Status: Working on it day by day
I wonder if your lawyer will even be surprised when you see her. Did you ever get all the financial info that you needed? It seems so long ago when this started. You need to take charge of your life now. sounds like you are really busy, though.
Yoyo, just stopping in the playhouse, I can see the leaps and bounds you have made.
Ask your atty how many cases has she handled going into court and her track record.
I am in a community state and it will be tough for me here even with a long term M. We are a fault state but even charging H with A is not that significant.
You need to toughen and play hard ball. I still have love for my H but I need to fight the good battle. I know any money he gets will be blown on the OW. He has put him in huge financial debt. I cannot help him but only help myself.
When it comes down to everything -- we decide and when they see we are not rolling over -- the waywards start to get surprised because they have had the upper hand for so long.
Take care.
Me 53 H 50 D16, D29 M 22 years bomb 7/08 INH - alien pod replaces H 8/08 - OW (direct report), I work there also bomb II - H moves 10/1 expose ow 10/22 D to be final 9-09
Well, I did it. I filed for divorce today. I feel so liberated! When I went to my attorney she asked if I wanted a separate maintenance filing or go straight for divorce. I thought about it for just a second or two and told her that I had tried for two and half years and I was ready to move on. I caught her up on everything. She agreed that it would be in my best interest to do a business valuation. She agreed that the business appears to be worth much more than what H is offering me. She will contact a CPA for the case.
I'm ready to get on with my life. I tried, H didn't. He just continued to cheat with OW and lie.
The indifference is near that I'm hoping for. Right now he ticks me off more than he hurts me. I think that's a good thing.
Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are. -- Bernice Johnson Reagon
There is a time to move and a time to hold. A time to take charge and a time to retreat. A time to action and a time for contemplation. I think you are finding that at this point in your life it is now the right choice to take definitive action. I am praying for you as you move forward.
Hey, Yoyo, I'll drink to that! What's that song, "I'm Gonna Wash that Man Right Out of My Hair"? You sound so empowered. good for you. He will get a big surprise in the mail.