It's been awhile since I posted an update, so I thought I'd start a new thread. Here's my last thread
I am in a stange place right now. We are back to living as a family. H is devoted to us, I can tell by his actions and the way he treats me. We are working on us, going every other week to MC, trying to plan date nights, treating each other better. But.. I feel like we have such a huge mountain to climb to even get close to being happy. H is so lethargic, nearly depressed I would say, looks terrible and feels awful most of the time. It's making me miserable too. He is supposed to start seeing a nutritionist to working on his weight, but he hasn't made an appointment yet. He has a dr's appt this Friday, which he's put off for a long time. I won't be surprised if he postpones it again.
Most of our MC sessions seem to be focused on his issues. There is so much about him that I am not happy with right now, but I know I want us to be together. I just want more.
I can relate. I had a lot of those same struggels as you are having at the beginning of our Reconciliation almost a year ago.
Now, I feel a whole lot better though. I am a lot more relaxed with my H now. We are back to doing almost every thing together again like we used to. He is living with me and we are remodeling a new house together that we will move into in april. I am so excited that we have accomplished all this.
I still get fears that pop in, but I tend to do all I can to trust him and just let the little things slide, and to think positively all the time.
I felt the same about the problems being "his" issues and not "mine". Either way they still exist. Support him and be as happy as you can when your with him. But in order for you both to ever really be happy again, you must allow the time for the healing on both your parts. It sounds like he is still not there yet. Which in turn will only slow down your healing also.
Refocus Yourself. Think about how far you have come. Have you got the KLA tapes from the DB store. I got them and I find it helps to listen to them about how to keep Love alive when your feeling down and out. It may help.
I am so happy to see your still working at your M with your H. It is not an easy task. Keep your chin up and be greatful for all the things you have.I am here for ya, I just dont pop in as often. But I still do check in here and vent here when needed.
Thanks Tipper and E! I'm not on her much any more and I guess that's a good thing. Sometimes I just feel like h and I are completely stalled. We're getting along pretty well and I can tell he's trying, but I guess I was hoping for things to have improved much more by this point.