I feel like a few of those comments may have been indirectly about me. Let me just say that I was very appreciative of all of the support I received here and I want to give that back to you all. I was absent for a long period of time for a variety of reasons, including: surgery, reconnection time w/W, and trying to get caught back up at work (which is where I usually log into this site from). Not excuses, but I want you all to know how appreciative I am and that although I was absent you were all in my thoughts. I do intend to keep offering a listening ear and any advise I can give. One problem I have, though, is that my sit turned around so quickly and radically I find that it may not be helpful to others. All I can say and offer to everyone here is that my marriage was healed by God's grace, not of my own doing, and that I hope everyone will wholeheartedly run to God.
I don't think those comments were made toward you at all, WP. Your story is inspirational, and important for others to hear. You take the words right out of my mouth and say it better than I could say it most of the time. Our marriage was saved by God as well, and until I started praying I kept stumbling. You are helpful here.
Oh, good. Thank you both. I guess that's just me taking things to personally. I wouldn't blame anyone if they had felt that way though. Have a nice weekend all.
I would never criticize a person for deciding to stand and fight for their marriage. Most of my aggressive techniques are ONLY because I recognize most people's inability to stand for too long, without further emotional, financial and even medical harm to themselves.
In other words, I recognize their limitations.
If people can do it -- if they can firewall their finances, lay (and learn to enforce) their boundaries, protect themselves sexually/medically -- then I'm all for standing for as long as they possibly can.
It's just that most people can't. I certainly couldn't.
Not at you at all...No doubt that God can do anything through Grace and your story is a shining example. I have found that DB accomplishes one of two things. One: It produces a reconciled marriage or Two: It strengthens the DBer to help them transitition out of the marriage because the other spouse doesn't wake up.
I remember the exchange here between Puppy and I that you are referring to. What i was saying was that although I didn't save my marriage I would continue to contribute where I can because of what I have learned through all of this...
V
***Getting up every day and learning to breathe in a new me. For me and my children***
Me: 43 W: 38 SD-15 S(s): 12,9,7 Separated-2/14/2009 My sitch
I have found that DB accomplishes one of two things. One: It produces a reconciled marriage or Two: It strengthens the DBer to help them transitition out of the marriage because the other spouse doesn't wake up.
V
That's exactly right!!! And either way I think you wind up way better off than you were when you started. Karen