How do I stop being my own worst enemy?

[mynewnormal]

Ok, a week ago (having been living separately for a month now on her request)my wife asked me to come over to work on separation paperwork.

I went over to my wife's house and basically said that after all this time (friends 32yrs M 12yrs) if we don't even try, we'll never know whether it could have been saved. Weds she came to my place and said that she was willing to try.
(a little background: I left at her request on Jan 16th, she was with another guy for a couple of weeks, listed her her status on facebook as single, the whole shebang)

As of today we have spent part or most of the past 7 days together, dinner out, at her place, shopping, etc. She speaks about her new place at times as if "we" will live there and at times as if it is "her" place (I get that, no problem). She removed her single status on FB, she has begun a bit of physical closeness (putting her feet on my lap, watching tv in the bedroom, occasional hugs and kisses). She has agreed to marriage counseling, but that scares me even more after hearing all of the failure horror stories.

I am an idiot. How do stop myself from getting over anxious and "pushing"? She says it will take time to heal the hurt and trust issues (I get that too in my head, it's my heart that is the problem) I asked her, and she says that she still finds me physically attractive, but still feels a wall there. After all of the pain, to find myself in this position is almost unbelievable to me (in a positive way). I am terrified of screwing it up. She thinks that a "counselor" is the only way to get help. How can I get her to consider an alternative?

I need help reigning myself in so that I stop being my own worst enemy.

[Forrest Gump]

"I am an idiot. How do stop myself from getting over anxious and "pushing"? "

Make the choice not to do this. To a point make it seem like you do not care to live there.

"I am an idiot."

No.. no you are not.

"I need help reigning myself in so that I stop being my own worst enemy."

What would you "reign" in.. if you could?

[mynewnormal]

Basically I guess need to go back to step one and take the "less is more" approach. I thought that the LR technique would be the hard part, but I guess for me it is not overreacting to positives and going into pursuit mode.

Thanks

[Forrest Gump]

"I thought that the LR technique would be the hard part"

Define "LR".

Use your words.

"but I guess for me it is not overreacting to positives and going into pursuit mode."

Did you answer your own question?

Think beyond the situation you find yourself in.

[mynewnormal]

In fact, I did. I have to stop pursuing her like my life depended on it. that's what got us back to where we are now. too soon to change, and why would I change what's working. Sometimes the simplest answer is the hardest to see.

Thanks

[mynewnormal]

I am now pretty speechless. Backed off. Let her be. Today, she told me she loved me. WOW!

Now the real work begins.

[Regrets]

That's wonderful, just be careful not to jump right back in there, take it slow.

Says she whose H won't look at her lol

Really hope you both make it

[breakaway]

I am now pretty speechless. Backed off. Let her be. Today, she told me she loved me. WOW!

Now the real work begins.

Why don't you want to see a counselor with her?

[mynewnormal]

I do. We have our first appointment on Friday morning. I have also been seeing one separately to work through my own personal issues. I realize that this is only the beginning.

[mynewnormal]

I hear you. Trying to take a mental chill pill. Just the beginning. I told her we have both been through a hurricane, and that I realize we have a lot of rebuilding to do. Slow and easy. I will try as hard as I can to take it slow and easy.