OK, this topic has come up several times on here (usually me being the one to bring it up) so I thought I would create a post specific for stripping tips!
So the main question might be....why do this at all? What's the point?
To me, the point is always that you will both get turned on. The point is NOT to lead to sex, nor is it really to let him see your naughty bits necessarily....it is more that you will both be primed up and thinking very sexually about each other and it can have a lasting effect on both of your minds for a long time. For a woman who has never behaved this seductively before, it can open up doors within her to new areas of sexual creativity. When you move your body seductively, it can translate itself into actual sexual movements during sex later.
First off, there are a few different categories here:
*Full on strip *Variations and mini-strips *Having him strip for her *How a man can ask for this and get it
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So lets start with the FULL ON STRIP...
There are many cd's and videos out there to help a woman get comfortable with this; they train you what to do, how to do it, how to move, give you example dances, tell you how to hold your body so that you are always showing your "best side". There are also cheap stripper poles you can buy at spencer's and other places. I don't have one but I do recommend them because it gives you something to be getting all rubbed up on, which is part of the turn on (for both of you). If you don't want the pole, you can do a lot with a chair, too.
To me, a full on strip means you are going to show all your naughty bits, even if you aren't fully naked. So you are going to need special lingerie or outfits, of course. This is also part of the fun for a woman! It means shopping!
You should also try to find out what kind of music he would think is most of a turn on. Hard core metal head bangin' Rob Zombie stuff? Or slow, sultry, jazzy, lyrical, winding seductive music? Figure that part out first, buy the music, and practice your dance to it specifically. You will need at least 3 songs for variation but 5 songs is best.
AND...it might be fun to get him some one or five dollar bills to give you, or dig out the monopoly money from the game board....because tucking dollars in your g-string will be the only way he gets to touch you! (If you find the money exchange part of this offensive, just leave it out).
I only recommend doing a full on strip no more than once every few months. You don't want your partner to be seeing too much of you in that type of activity...over time it tends to take away from the experience to give them "too much" of it.
Doing this for his birthday or father's day is always a great treat! Give yourself time to tone up, get the cd's and practice, and buy the outfits and sort of plan out your dances weeks ahead of time, so that by the time you do this for him, you are really comfortable.
Lucky mentioned making it a clown dance so that you can get through it easier. Hey, laughter is sexy! So if you fall on your butt during this or the chair slips out from under you, make sure you are just light and breezy and silly about it....and add in all the light, breezy and silliness you want, according to your relationship. If your man is kinda shy, he may appreciate the comic relief.
Regarding touching....personally, I find it more of a turn on to strip for a man when he is following the usual strip club rules: you can touch him but he can't touch you. Make this clear upfront, or write it out in "instructions" that you leave at the "door" of the "club" you are inventing. But if you want him to be able to touch you that is fine too, just realize that many men kind of need that rule in order to not try to jump your bones immediately, ok? In other words, if you don't implement a "no touching during the show" rule, then he might actually try to stop your dancing and make love to you right there, which will ruin the point of the show for both of you. Also there is something really hot about being seductive to him but not letting him touch you. But use your own rules and play and have fun.
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Variations and mini-strips....
You can do all of the above, and not actually show your naughty bits. You can keep them covered up for the duration of the show you give him, if you are more comfortable. So that is one variation, a full on strip without actually showing the goods.
You could do this as above and also just show him a "peek" here and there during your show.
Trust me ladies, I know that it is difficult to just poke him in the face with all your junk in broad daylight (or even candle light sometimes) especially when you know the point of this exercise is to let him look at you. So maybe you will only be brave enough to just pop your legs open for 3 seconds during the show? That's ok. Maybe when you do it again for him in a few months you will pop them open for 10 seconds.
A mini-strip can be very very mini...such as, literally just flashing your boobs at him after he has left the house and is almost in his car and you are still standing at the kitchen window. Just a simple trick like this can really turn you both on. For you, it is brave and will make you feel naughty and brazen. For him, it should be unexpected, and he might feel like he got to sneak a peek when he shouldn't have.
A mini-strip can be more than that too, such as maybe you just turn some music on before you two are about to get in bed together and you do a little dance as you strip down to nothing to get in bed together.
Another variation would be to serve him dinner or breakfast in bed topless. Again this is best for birthday or special occasions, and best if there is a no touching rule. Topless is also great if you are the one who cuts his hair.
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Having him strip for her....
This one is trickier.
Men want to be admired and lusted after, too. They secretly wish that women lusted after their bodies visually the same way they do ours. So when you can get your man comfortable enough to strip for you and if you can give him the same feeling that he gives you when you strip for him (ie: that he is so beautiful you can't take your eyes off of him) you will find him starting to blossom into a new sexual creature, too.
But again, it is tricky. First off, it takes time for a woman to open up herself enough to "see" her man lustfully the way he sees her. So the woman has to inner work to do to be able to visually appreciate him.
Second, its hard for the man too, because they are not naturally fluid movers and dancers the way women are...it is harder for them to find the grace necessary to do a little dance.
But if you can both find that place of comfort to be able to ask your man to strip for you...and if he can pull it off....and if you can find within yourself your area of animal lust for the human body....it will be really fun, I promise you!
You may have to buy him a CD on how to do this on YOUR birthday for you. You will also have to buy him the sexy fireman outfit or whatever you have in mind that would turn YOU on.
But if a woman is confident and persistent, her man will likely give this a try because he is seeing she is really wanting it....he wants to turn her on and he also (secretly) wants to be admired and pawwed after like a Chippendale's guy.
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How a man (or woman) can ask for this and get it...
I have said before that its best to ask for this as a birthday or anniversary treat for yourself, that way your spouse is more likely to do it.
BUT...another way a man can encourage this behavior and kind of work up to it is by making brazen requests of her now and then. For instance, as she is walking out of the room (and she is a fair distance away from him), a man could say to his wife "hey, turn around!" To get her attention, then when she is looking at him and saying "why?" he can say "flash me!" He might be surprised that after she chuckles and acts offended, that she might actually pop her shirt up real quick and then giggle while running away. Little things like this will break the ice and help her have fun at it. Remeber guys, it is actually FUN for her to do this, but she has to feel like she is totally safe and that just being turned on is enough for you...it is not about having sex.
Also, men should remember that until or unless his wife has become very open about this stuff, he should not "flash" her back. It will not have the same effect and you will both feel deflated. Again, it takes women longer to connect up their visual enjoyment and their animal lust.
But when she does get to that point, she WILL enjoy getting flashed back.
Another way a man can ask for a strip show is by just stating that he has always had a fantasy that *his* woman would do a special sexual show for only *his* benefit. This takes her to a place of knowing that this is intensely personal, that he doesn't just want any woman stripping for him, he wants HIS OWN woman stripping for ONLY him.
And finally, men should be careful if his wife DOES get the CD's about stripping. Don't sneak off and watch her strip-for-your-man CD when she's not around just to gawk at Carmen or whoever is doing the video training, ok? Don't lessen this experience for her by getting side-tracked by what looks like a sexy video. Yes, these are sexy videos but if your wife bought it so she can learn how to dance like that for you, then don't violate her boundaries by wanting to see the hotties on the CD, too.
This is awesome! I need to get one of those tapes. I'm much better at finding confidence when I've had some instruction and practice.
H was playing Garage a Trois in the car this weekend, and I was thinking that some of it would be good for a strip. Another possibility, especially with my "vintage glam" type of beauty, would be to get some vintage burlesque music.
I so needed to read this today. I was starting to take myself too seriously! I am signing up for an exotic dance class. I have been saying it for about 2 months now, but I really AM going to do it. I will be 40 on Sunday and it is time to have some fun just for me. If my DH is really lucky, when he gets back from his deployment, he will get to see my newly acquired skills!
Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~ SMW
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Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
