No, I was taking care of the turtles. Especially the one that died that really puzzled me. She was my favorite.
I tried to call him and he would not pick up the phone.
H filed for support from me and won. What a kick in the crotch.
Went for custody - he got S13, I got D9. Ordered S and I to go to counseling to see why he doesn't want to come home. H begrudgingly agreed. We said he has to be supportive of it and take him there, and go himself if required. He didn't like that. We have the kids together on alternating weekends. I don't get S13 until 9/11. Trying to find fun things to fill the weekend. H actually had him write down for the court why he doesn't want to see me. Then through the hearing he did much mudslinging. It was highly upsetting. And not right. I will not drop to such tactics. I told the court I could tell stories about him as well but that is not what we are here for. They agreed. They also told him that S13 was only a child, and does not get to make his own decisions. AMEN! Finally some sense!
Me 43 H 44 S-13 D-9 Separated 90 days 6/28/05 H Says he is done-10/2/06-day after 18th anniv Moved out 10/2/07-to father's house-day after 19th wedding anniv-GF now H Filed for D 7/08
I couldn't imagine not being able to see my children every day. or having one of my children turn their back on me.
BUT....
I think it is time for you to finally make some changes for yourself. The depression seeps through your words. The anger and the bitterness thwart your words and your demeanor.
And your STBX and your children see this.
What happened to the fun and loving Woman you used to be?
Where the heck did your back bone go?
I think it is time for you to take dominion over your family and stop being so damn afraid and fragile.
Both you and I started on this DB site together, and have both been on a major rollercoaster ride.
Neither of us has had it easy, but you have continued to wallow in the mud and have not moved forward.
You have every right to be angry at the situation, but you can not live in this anger or it will destroy you and the children.
They need to see their Mother doing things with a smile on her face. They need to feel safe around you. They should not feel as though their Mom is going to fall apart and they have to keep her together. Children should not have to walk on eggshells arond their parents.
They are NOT to be the go between of you and your Husband, this is so wrong. Regardless of what happens they need to know that their parents love them.
Only you can make this happen, only you can decide how you want to live the rest of your life.
Go get some anti depressants, see a therapist, join a gym.......
Do something different!!!!
(((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
Not sure where you got that from, but my depression days are over. I do have a smile on my face - short of dealing with this stuff that is tough. And I never did have a back bone. I have a new man in my life now who has made a real change for me. I have done my best not to use the kids as a go between. H refused to communicate with me since early June, he only communicates through the kids. Now after the hearings he is communicating w/me again. I text my son my love for him, my daughter I tell everyday. My son has been pulled to his fathers side. All I can do is tell him I love him and wait for the day that he realizes the truth in what has happened, that his father is not the supreme being he thinks he is and I am not the devil. His father blames me for them living at his father's house so he has passed that onto my son which is WRONG! I do not share what is going on with my kids unless necessary like custody stuff.
The court told H that S13 was 13, therefore a child and does not get to make decisions. He was highly upset with that, told the court that he lets his kids make their own decisions. At least someone had some sense! They said he has to see me. But we both have to go to counseling, which I was going to anyway, for the last 2 yrs, D9 and I, and when I wanted S to go he refused. So I am glad they are requiring it of him. His father won't go and sees it as a bad thing so he passed that along as well. And now he has to take him and go himself if required to show support. Finally something in this D that made sense!
Me 43 H 44 S-13 D-9 Separated 90 days 6/28/05 H Says he is done-10/2/06-day after 18th anniv Moved out 10/2/07-to father's house-day after 19th wedding anniv-GF now H Filed for D 7/08
D9 started school today. D13 starts tomorrow in a new district. I left him a message wishing him well.....
Me 43 H 44 S-13 D-9 Separated 90 days 6/28/05 H Says he is done-10/2/06-day after 18th anniv Moved out 10/2/07-to father's house-day after 19th wedding anniv-GF now H Filed for D 7/08
I get custody of S13 this weekend for the first time since May.....Any advice? Laser tag on fri night, picnic on Sat. Trying to keep him busy...
Me 43 H 44 S-13 D-9 Separated 90 days 6/28/05 H Says he is done-10/2/06-day after 18th anniv Moved out 10/2/07-to father's house-day after 19th wedding anniv-GF now H Filed for D 7/08
