"I don't wanna spend my life jaded, waiting...

[theotherhalf]

What is the record here for locked threads? Am I in the running.
Old thread...

This song haunts me everyday. Hmmm...

Wasted lyrics

Standing at the back door
She tried to make it fast
One tear hit the hard wood
It fell like broken glass
She said sometimes love slips away
And you just can't get it back
Let's face it

For one split second
She almost turned around
But that would be like pouring rain drops
Back into a cloud
So she took another step and said
I see the way out and I'm gonna' take it

I don't wanna' spend my life jaded
Waiting to wake up one day and find
That I've let all these years go by
Wasted

Another glass of whisky but it still don't kill the pain
So he stumbles to the sink and pours it down the drain
He says it's time to be a man and stop living for yesterday
Gotta face it.

Cause' I don't wanna' spend my life jaded
Waiting to wake up one day and find
That I've let all these years go by
Wasted

Oh I don't wanna' keep on wishing, missing
The still of the morning, the color of the night
I ain't spending no more time
Wasted

She kept drivin' along
Till the moon and the sun were floating side-by-side
He looked in the mirror and his eyes were clear
For the first time in a while

Hey, yeah,
Oh, I don't wanna' spend my life jaded
Waiting to wake up one day and find
That I've let all these years go by
Wasted

Oh I don't wanna' keep on wishing, missing
The still of the morning, the color of the night
I ain't spending no more time
Wasted

Oh, I don't wanna' spend my life jaded
Waiting to wake up one day and find
That I've let all these years go by
Wasted

Yeah, yeah
Oh I don't wanna' keep on wishing, missing
The still of the morning, the color of the night
I ain't spending no more time
Wasted

[MidwesternGirl]

TOH:

You've got to stop thinking and damning and all else.

Start focusing on you, your hobbies, kids, etc. Until you do this, you will go around in circles.

Don't call him, don't insult or yell at him. He expects you to do those things because you always have. You have to have ZERO expectations. He is not going to come home based on those actions, is he?

Try really hard this week to:

focus on you, your kids, your hobbies
try not to call him at all unless someone is in an emergency situation

[glamgirl]

TOH you need to focus on you. What does your h have to come back to? Give him something to come home to! Why would he come home if all you do is condemn him for what he did or still does?

Is that really the TOH that you want to portray to him?

[theotherhalf]

Today my focus is ALL about ME. My H has lied, disrespected, went to OW, one to many times. Somehow I found hope today in what lies ahead for me. Somehow today I realized it does not matter where I go or what I do, that I will make the best of MY life and find happiness in MY future. I almost feel I should thank him, because now all the hurt he is dishing out is just fueling my strength!

I am starting to believe that things will never change with my H. He is stuck and OW and I are just helping him stay there. I don't think he will move forward for a very long time. I cannot compete with OW. She is a repeat liar and a cheat so she understands him . She walked away from her kids and M, tore up another M before mine, so she "gets" what he is going through. They deserve each other.

I am not going to sit here and wait for him to tire of OW and come back to me. I will not be second best. She can't even hold a candle to me and if he cannot see that then he really is off his rocker and does not deserve to be with me.

I will not wait for him to put us so far in debt that there is nothing left. I will not be a fool for him any longer. I love him so very very much, I believe in death do us part, but neither of those things gives him the right to use me and tear me apart. It will not happen any more.

So this is my thoughts for today. Tonight, tomorrow, the next day, they may change, but I don't think so. I think enough is finally enough.

[naej]

TOH,

I will not wait for him to put us so far in debt that there is nothing left. I will not be a fool for him any longer. I love him so very very much, I believe in death do us part, but neither of those things gives him the right to use me and tear me apart. It will not happen any more.

Well good for you, hold on to that thought, print it out and put it all over the place. Wherever you will see it many times a day. You don't have to keep reading it just see the printout.
Apparently it is a good day for new beginnings.
Well done.

[theotherhalf]

Did I say that? I wish I was as strong and determined as that post sounds. :}

I heard last night that the my H's old job is really on the edge of closing. With any luck and God's grace. OW will lose her job and move far far away...

JK Not that blind to think that even if she does, anything will change between H and I. But at least THAT woman will GONE.

N15 had a ball game last night. The lost, really badly. But always fun to watch. H didn't show. I never mentioned it. He has a calendar. He did call her on his way to work, said he never seen it till going to work. Told her to call him when she has home games.

My work is SOOOOO SLOOOW. Too much thinking time. Maybe, maybe not. Tonight we'll have a little R&R and American Idol time.

Have a great day everyone!
TOH

[MidwesternGirl]

toh

you are much too focused on ow.

you have got to let it go because if you dwell on that, you will not be able to move forward. stop thinking about his lies, his faults, etc. focus on you, what you can do to improve yourself. all of us have our faults,weaknesses, things we did we wished we did not do.

let it go..............

[itsy]

TOH...
Please take the time and secure your future finances...this is very important step to follow thru with...I remember that he comes and helps out with money and worlk around the property but if he is out there spending get it secured for your self and peace of mind.

I know that it is hard not to focuse on the OW...try not to..she did not get the best part of the H...she is getting sloppy seconds and that is all she deserves...all the other women ex was with did not mean a thing to me...I was very strong when it came to that...thank God..and there were so many..except Prostitue junkie girlfriend and really there is no comparasion...there are just getting a man that was once a great person and we had the best..

You are doing great to move on keep it up hoaw is the painting going...what else do you do? i know that you live in a small town do you ever get together with other women that are your friends? Start a goal list that is always helpful to guide your future endeavors...kee moving forward..
ITSY

[theotherhalf]

I may be a total and complete idiot but I really don't think H will intentionally break me financially. I don't think. As I've said before. Regardless of ALL that has happened. Even after 21 months since bomb, he continues to deposit his paycheck every week into our account. He only takes out 50-60 bucks cash and only writes checks for gas, smokes, groceries, and beer. I have credit checked him and don't think there are any other accounts. Even if there were I don't know where he'd get the money to deposit in there.

Back when he was really crazy he did talk about opening his own account. He even went to get an ATM card. The bank would not let him because his address was different. They told him to open his own He said he would later. It never happened. Nothing more about it since then.

[LL44]

You aren't an idiot.

If he hasn't shown any sign of deceiving you financially, I think you are good to go.

xH has never once 'screwed' me financially, and I still trust him in that aspect. And the kids. Anything after that, not so much.