Sophie.. Take Snodderly's advise never go back to that counselor...I had one like that 2 visits and I was out... she was all for husband leaving. I wasn't ready for that and she did more harm to me. In my experience L's like money!!!! Every time they you or him contact them ""cha ching...You have explained to L you intentions I think he heard them... By not doing anything about D your husband will have too and he will have to pay. Itsy
M54 H54 married 30 years Prostitues and Other women "100's" 10/7/2004 Prostitue/Junkie girlfriend 6/04-1/07? Left 1/5/05 returned 1/9/05 Asked h to leave 4/2005 Had to, prostitues OW 5/2005 not a prostitue Divorced 9/2006
In my experience L's like money!!!! Every time they you or him contact them ""cha ching...You have explained to L you intentions I think he heard them... By not doing anything about D your husband will have too and he will have to pay.
This is exactly my plan...make H be responsible for any decision and action moving this forward.
But...I got a bill today for $60...20 minutes worth of work by my L when he corrected his own mistake and sent a memo to H's L asking 'what's up?" (basically). I don't think I should have to pay for time my L spends correcting his own mistake or for something I did not ask him to do.
?????right???
Sophie
~~ Me-50 H-38 Married 15 years 8/7/08 D8 S10 S13 H affair 11/04-7/04 maybe longer H moved out 4/06
7/30/08- present: Reconnecting w/kids,friendly 10/30/08 H signed D papers 11/10/08 D papers filed 11/13/08 D papers served at home
Sophie, Welcome to the world of lawyers. Any time your lawyer does anything concerning your case, the bills will roll in.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I see...I thought I had made it clear that we were only to respond and react to anything that came back.
My L sent a memo asking for more...I don't think my L remembered much of what I said. I am not a big enough case for him. Now...he has said he understands to not move forward unless I say so.
The memo was an addition to my L's note of correction. We my L filed the letter that he was representing me...he put another woman's name. DUH...I should not have to pay my L to correct his own mistake.
Right??
This L is a good one...he has many high profile cases and was recommended by another good L. I don't doubt his ability...I don't think he paid enough attention to my little case.
Sophie
~~ Me-50 H-38 Married 15 years 8/7/08 D8 S10 S13 H affair 11/04-7/04 maybe longer H moved out 4/06
7/30/08- present: Reconnecting w/kids,friendly 10/30/08 H signed D papers 11/10/08 D papers filed 11/13/08 D papers served at home
Your in a better position in this regards, please keep in mind that Lawyers are not the law. Do not give ground and do not let them intimidate you and yes, Your now in the world of 75 dollar a page letters, 50 dollar phone calls, and 250 dollar meetings. Keep this in mind. Sit back and let him spend the cash.
I usually post on Surviving, but I saw your info and just wanted to let you know I am in your neck of the woods (I live in Stafford County). If you need someone to talk to I am on FB and several board members also have my e-mail.
Wow Suzy...you are close...isn't that amazing??? I've never been to FB...I'll try to navigate my way.
I've been in Spotsy for about 7 years...but, I do not know my way to, or around, Stafford!! Well...I know Stafford is up 95 a bit...LOL
Sophie
~~ Me-50 H-38 Married 15 years 8/7/08 D8 S10 S13 H affair 11/04-7/04 maybe longer H moved out 4/06
7/30/08- present: Reconnecting w/kids,friendly 10/30/08 H signed D papers 11/10/08 D papers filed 11/13/08 D papers served at home
If H filed the complaint, and I simply responded, is there an amount of time after which, I can have the case dropped? Or is H the only one to drop it?
Sophie
~~ Me-50 H-38 Married 15 years 8/7/08 D8 S10 S13 H affair 11/04-7/04 maybe longer H moved out 4/06
7/30/08- present: Reconnecting w/kids,friendly 10/30/08 H signed D papers 11/10/08 D papers filed 11/13/08 D papers served at home
Sophie, Each state is different. You can go out on the internet and look up the state laws for your area or you can ring up your lawyer and ask, which will cost you $$$.
I can tell you from my own experience, once the papers are filed, unless the person who filed pulls them back, they will move forward quite quickly.
If you and your h are still haggling out the details, it could take months to come to some agreement. In my case, we were still haggling and went to court anyway and that's when things finally got ironed out. Sometimes the court has to step in and get things settled when the parties don't agree.
It is my understanding that you can't drop the case....if he filed, he has to be the one to pull it back. Yes, you should hear if an extension is filed, but in most cases, when dealing w/mlc, they don't want an extension...they want the divorce as quickly as possible.
I would suggest that you get on the internet and check out the laws in your state as soon as possible with regards to divorce. The more you know about the proceedings, the better prepared you will be.
