Yesterday was OK, H came over after work to watch the Chiefs lose. H stayed until about 7:00, we watched Pittsburgh come back, so that put me in the hunt with football! We didn't talk about much, I don't know what to think anymore I guess. I took him some tarts and the football sheet this morning to his work. His friend is looking for tickets for us for the San Diego game Sunday. Then he called to tell me a guy I made tarts for on Saturday wants some more for Thursday, then asked if I was going to go with him to do SD's Christmas shopping. I said yeah I figured I would. H said when do you want to go? I said whenever? It was just weird him asking me. Then H said, I am going to have to start working all the time to pay for our trip to Arizona. H said, something about me paying for it. We both laughed.
OH yeah!! One time I drove a van to pick them up 30 miles away at a nursery, we used to give them away to all employees, well by the time I got back with the van full, I had bumps everywhere! It was wild!!!
Oh I'm getting upset. I am missing a whole box of christmas decorations. I may have to go buy two more small trees. And a new tree skirt. What to do? Calm, breath. Keep looking. Pray that i find them.
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
I've never heard of a Poinsetta allegery MT. Are you allergic to other things?
Well, I took a nap and when I got up H was gone. Hunting I guess. No note or anything. I am having a hard day and my emotions have been out of wack. I hate this. All of his lies, the dates and times, the excuses etc. are all crashing back. I've tried to keep them in check, but haven't done real well today. I am hurt and angry. I won't even tell you about the video I see every time I close my eyes, I'm sure that most of you have seen it too. He lied to me, he f'ing lied to me. For months.
Boy this is sure hard.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
I am with you Hope, I can't say my H lied, sometimes I think it would be easier to be a fool than an idiot. I know I am not, but it is how I feel sometimes. Today for some reason, I am just not feeling right. I am not feeling very "customer service friendly" today. I am faking it, but it just isn't there.
I am allergic to weird things...I am guessing from the poinsetta after I carried it to the main office, my neck and under my chin was hot and tight, very weird. Christmas trees get me too, the smell, and then fake ones will cause me to break out in little red bumps. It is a bit weird. I allergic to everything Christmas, and I love Christmas. This year, can't say I do so much, but it was always so special. One of those days when I was always so excited. I have lost my spirit this year.
No I haven't heard anything from BG. I wonder if Kel has talked to her.
Hope, take care of yourself, I am praying for you.
I can't get in the spirit either. I've been trying to put up my Christmas tree all weekend, and you know, I just don't care. I know that I am supposed to be up and positive and forgiving etc... but I am just tired.
I also get little red bumps on my hands and arms each year whether we put up a real or the artificial tree. I'd have to say that the real one is worse, but I also get them from the artificial. I guess it's where I get poked by the branches.
H just called. He has been out hunting with a friend that lives the next road over. The friend got a buck and H is helping him hang it. I'm glad that he called to let me know, but I am really having to fake it too. I know that there are lots of people that have it so much worse than I do, I'd have to say that I am just feeling sorry for myself today.
I'm sure that tomorrow will be better.
Hope that your evening is good and that you win your football game. I'm going to be watching with you!
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
