Your response now is "Great. See you Thursday then." Leave it at that. You don't have to jump to explain your plans. Make him ask again. Leave him wondering a bit.
I think it's awesome that he's quitting his job to spend more time with his daughter. Maybe when you see him you can thank him for making sacrifices for her. Somehow acknowledge that he is giving something up to put her first and you appreciate it.
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
Hi Ms Ladybug, Thanks for posting. See this is what I thought about saying (or something similar)
I mean that this whole mess has made me look at things differently. I'm no longer willing to sit at home and pout. I'm moving on. Ideally, I'd like to move forward with you. But no matter what happens I'm going to live my life - I'm gonna hang out with friends, spend time with my sister, exercise more, go watch my former cheerleaders. I'm gonna do things that make me happy. I'm officially done with sitting around waiting for you to come back home. I can only wait so long before I decide that I need more.
But...keeping it short and simple is better? To make him be the one to wonder?
Me: 34 H: 34 DD: 3 M: 8 yrs H moved out Oct. 2008, "not happy" "don't know what I want" "will always love you, but not in love with you" PA Bomb: April 5, 2010
I'd lean towards not SAYING anything. Just do it. SHOW him that you have a life. Show him that you can be happy. Don't tell him what you are going to do, just do it!
I know! You're right. Why do I keep second guessing myself? I'm starting to annoy myself!
Me: 34 H: 34 DD: 3 M: 8 yrs H moved out Oct. 2008, "not happy" "don't know what I want" "will always love you, but not in love with you" PA Bomb: April 5, 2010
Oh, I thought he was asking about your plans for Thursday. But, he's asking whether you're moving on! Got it!
I agree, say nothing. Actions are WAY more powerful than words. People will say all kinds of things to get what they want, but it's the actions that show true change.
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
I know! You're right. Why do I keep second guessing myself? I'm starting to annoy myself!
You are second guessing yourself because in the beginning DB goes against your instinct. It goes against what you see in the movies, and read in fiction. It really doesn't feel right, at first. You want to DO something, to say SOMETHING, and sometimes that's just not the right thing to do!
Ahhhh! I get it. I'm just having a really hard time with it.
Me: 34 H: 34 DD: 3 M: 8 yrs H moved out Oct. 2008, "not happy" "don't know what I want" "will always love you, but not in love with you" PA Bomb: April 5, 2010
