This is an excellent question, IMO. I have been celibate since the bomb, when H first encountered OW in person, a year ago (they had been doing everything imaginable via electronics for several months already, but she lives five hours away so they hadn't met in the flesh until then). H and I still sleep in the same bed, but neither of us has indicated any interest in ML with each other since the bomb.
So at the moment the question is moot in my life, but I am very nervous about potential STD issues with the prospect of getting re-involved with H sexually, which I wouldn't expect to happen as long as he is boinking someone else. Did you know that men can transmit HPV but cannot be tested for it (no test developed for males yet)? My doctor told me this recently when I discussed my current sitch and asked her to test me for everything STD-wise because I no longer had confidence that H's affair of 7 years ago was entirely an EA, as he claims, as I no longer trust him to tell me the truth about anything. Thankfully, everything came back negative. It was a rather disturbing experience to read the form I had to sign to be tested for AIDS, though.
I have worked too @#$%^&*( hard to save myself from drowning in suicidal depression in the last year to let my life/health be compromised by H's actions, so a lot will have to happen before he gets into my pants again!
I'm going to be very interested to hear the responses to this, as it is one of my biggest fears about reconciliation of my M.
Peace, Dawn
Me 45/H 47, no kids Together since 1985; M/1992 Bomb1 (EA-OW1, age 22) 2001 Bomb2 (EA/PA-OW2, age 22) 10/2007, A continues H left 11/24/08 minimal contact, no legal action http://tinyurl.com/DawnHope1
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
There is someone on the bb that has got a STD she posted about it quite recently, but just can't remember her name sorry. Also Dawn made a good point and unless you get the tests you can't rely on just having no symptons to decide you are ok. If you sleep with a man who sleeps around or even just one other partner you are at risk, get tested for your own sake.
Oh Cagzmon, I am sorry I know you can get treated ( I have never actually had experience of this) but I am sure mentally / emotionally it must be a huge blow. Just another kick in the teeth I guess. Take care.
Several years ago, I knew of a woman whose husband was fooling around and she ended up in the hospital for a few days as she contracted one. Not sure which type it was but for her to be hospitalized has to be serious.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
