This thread is horrifying. Reading about the abuse of these children is just awful. I can't believe an adult who thinks he is OK could do this to his kids.
I will pray that you will STOP of there will be intervention. These children would be much safer emotionally in the care of someone OTHER than their parents.
By the way Phil, I've seen your type before. They live on the edge of 'control'. They only survive when they have people around them who are weaker than they are.
Kind of like being the wolf in the herd of sheep.
But eventually the sheep realize who they have laid down with.
Sometimes the wolf realizes that they want peace with the sheep.
There is a really good boy in my son's cub scout den who is always accompanied by his grandfather and/or grandmother. I asked the grandfather where his parents are. He said that when they got divorced, the custody issue went before the judge and the judge said that neither parent was qualified to raise the boy and asked if anyone was present that could - Grandpa raised his hand and was awarded full custody.
I hope you realize that all the venom you have written on here could be discovered by your W and used in court against you.
Phil's wife is the only one in this equation who shows the courage and ability to change.
Walking out on him was probably the hardest thing she's ever done.
She's going to get through this stage and if she's smart, she'll get her act together and keep the kids the majority of the time. If not...the kids are only going to suffer more and become dysfunctional themselves.
At any rate, if/when Phil hits rock bottom he will become one of two things:
Humble - finally accepting responsibility for his own behaviors and maybe then he will seek real change
or
Bitter - and continue to blame everyone else in the world for the fact that he's an egotistical, obstinate jerk.
The best thing that could happen to this guy is for him to lose every single thing he has.
Phil's wife is the only one in this equation who shows the courage and ability to change.
Walking out on him was probably the hardest thing she's ever done.
She's going to get through this stage and if she's smart, she'll get her act together and keep the kids the majority of the time.
Amy,
I'm not sure I'd go that far. Realizing, of course, that we're getting everything about her filtered thru LP, I don't think she's much more stable than he is (altho yes, she at least showed some courage in leaving him. She's also MUCH better at detaching, and DBing).
I'm still not convinced that her and EGF don't have something twisted going on, and I've ALWAYS wondered what that teenaged girl was doing at her house at 1 a.m. Instead of reacting to, and escalating, all of the drama that she dishes out, Phil would have been better off to just fully detach and gather some good intel on her. I'd bet my lunch that there is infidelity in the mix SOMEWHERE.