Today my H & I have been living seperate for a year. Are biggest issue was & is not communicating & growing apart in our short M. (Don't know how to add my other thread - but it's - Happy When It Rains Me Condensed).
I went to a festival today w/friends & ran into my H's bandmate. We got talking & I found out my H has a "girlfriend" - Ouch! (Granted this is his pattern when R goes bad. So I kinda expected it). He is also a depressed person.
I have been staying away from R talk - on our meger communication. Before this happened today, I decided that I need to see a lawyer. And had decided that I need to find out if H still wants to be M. I have not emailed him but plan on doing so tomorrow.
I suppose I shouldn't tell him that I know of OW. What do I want, stupid me, still wants my H back & to go to M counseling. Does anyone have any advise for me when contacting him??
Currently, I'm trying to detox from the info I received today.
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
MsMel, Bad turn of events. Sorry friend. I would go see the lawyer find out that angle it's part of the deal. Get some referrals, I asked some attorneys I knew, If you were getting divorced who would you use? Found out pretty quick who was good. Don't blame yourself. Real kick in the gut. You can handle it. I will supply the jokes, you just laugh. Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Thanx for the support Coach. It really mean a lot. The saying old habits never die .... so true unless .... you can change your actions/reactions to them!
His bandmate said my H is depressed & doesn't know what he wants. Always looking for happines within someone else, I said. Well, even though my heart was racing - I did keep an upbeat attitude.
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
Hi JenInVen, Thanx for stopping by. I do realize that L can persuade the D topic. But you see - was stupid & didn't have a pre-nup done - I came into the M w/property - he w/debt. So I have much to loose. I love my H - but - not more than myself. (Now that the love euphoria is gone after th honeymoon stage).
Think I need another DBcoach session too.
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I would probably just vent right now. Let it all out. It sucks. So tell me how are you really feeling? how POd are you?
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I'm very POd - some at myself for not getting a prenup & for being so stupid in love at the time. Currently, all I can chalk it up to is "live & learn". I'm POd cuz this is the same thing he did with his 1st W. I thought he had changed....that we really had something ... special. I feel the fool - where's the dunce hat???
I'm POd at him for knowing & realizing that we were growing apart & thought the best thing to do was tell me & run away the same day. Not even giving me a chance to work on our M. I say MAN UP and stop being a f****ing child. I feel hurt & feel even more betrayed, because loyalty - is a big issue for me & he knows it. What a f***ing b***rd.
I feel annoyed cuz my sister & friend there - didn't give me any understanding, only the yada yada lecture to D cuz you deserve better. (True I do)... but like you can turn love off like a faucet.
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
The saying old habits never die .... so true unless .... you can change your actions/reactions to them!