God give me the patience and the strength...6

[theotherhalf]

Last thread...

New thread...new day...maybe things can improve somehow this time...

[MidwesternGirl]

Improvement begins with you.

Three simple words: Let him be

[theotherhalf]

thanks SF

[a new 2moro]

but you have gone round and round and round again with your h.

ITS THAT CYCLE IM WAS TALKING ABOUT.....EVERYONE SEES IT.


A) THEY LIE...CHECK

B) THEY CHEAT....CHECK

C) AND YES THEY SPEND....AND CHECK

YOU NEED TO FIND A GOOD D LAWYER FAST.

And even though he is talking to her again, he is being fairly good to me and around more than usual when they are together.

DONT BELIEVE HIM FOR A SECOND....ADMITTING TO THAT, HE CAN CONSIDER HIMSELF TELLING A TRUTH. AT LEAST THATS HOW MY H WAS. ITS AMAZING THEY CAN LOOK YOU STRAIGHT IN THE EYE AND LIE...AND HE WILL.

[a new 2moro]

Why would he go back to her now?

UHMMMM.....COULD IT BE ??? YOU ARE BEGGING, PLEADING, PURSUING, PUSHING R TALK, LOOSING YOUR TEMPER SCREAMING FOR D ONE MINUTE....THEN QUIET THE NEXT OR BEGGING THIM TO GO CAMPING,CHASING HIM DOWN AT HIS HOUSE AND OW'S, ACCEPTING AND DISHING OUT PHYSICAL ABUSE.....

WHO WOULD YOU FIND MORE ATTRACTIVE????
ALL OW HAS TO DO IS SIT QUIETLY AND OFFER SUPPORT TO H. YOU HAVE DONE ALL THE WORK FOR HER.

[theotherhalf]

I know! I got it! And it it's probably too late...

[theotherhalf]

funny story...

we've been having a real problem with coons this summer. They started moving in last summer when "nick" (our st.bernard) started to slow up. Well now that he is gone they've taken over. N14 and I have been struggling lately to keep them out of the cat food. Well everything we try they out smart us. So we moved the food into the basement stareway (covered stairway that leads to basement).

Last night D17 comes home about 10:30. She calls my cell. Says "get the gun!" I said "what?!?! "Get the gun". "come here" so I go to the kitchen door and open it slowly. She is out in the drive. On her hands and knees on the hood of my car. She points to the right of my door. There on a ladder leaning against the house is a coon. (big baby) She says there is 3 or 4 of them and they were climbing the ladder to get on the house. Well they ran away. And we laughed. Well today I realize what they were doing...The cat food is in there. If they climb the ladder they can get in around the eave because the siding is not finished under there and it's open. Smart little suckers.

Anyway we got a good laugh and thought I'd share.

On another note...
Got a phone call tonight from my H's best friend from way back. He lives out of state and we never see him anymore. He called once right after H moved out. Well he calls tonight just to see how I am and how things are going. We talked awhile. He doesn't get it either. Anyways we caught up and said our goodbyes.

It's been 15 min or so. He just called back. He said, "I just wanted to tell you that I don't think your stupid at all for hanging in there and not giving up on him. Us guys we have our heads up our a*sses once in ahile. I actually think what your doing is pretty cool. Just take care of you." I told him not all would agree but thanks for that.

Now I'm crying...if only H would agree

[theotherhalf]

Too much time on my hands today. I've been thinking of and missing H alot today. Tonight is his last night at his work of 17 years...I wanted to call him, say "good luck" or "sorry" or I don't know what. I didn't. Letting him go remember?...They get off at midnight tonight and tradition is they'll all go to bar afterwork to celebrate last night. OW lives in that town. Will he end up at her place after??? Really trying not to think about it but oh so hard.

I realized today that my H moved out to his own place a year ago last week. It's still so hard and unbelievable. I still feel like I am stuck in a bad dream. I remember back then reading here that alot of WAS came back after a year of S. I remember thinking OMG how can I make it that long without him. Well here I am a year later and I am okay. But there is no hope insight that my H will ever move back home. Maybe it's just been too long. Absense in our case only made his heart grow colder and take him farther away from me. I guessed this way back then, this time I wish I had been wrong.

Today I am thinking that once he gets his 401 in hand, he will file for D and this mess will all be over. I really did try people. I just couldn't do it right...

[MidwesternGirl]

Please stop dwelling on what you don't know. It gets your head spinning in different directions.

You have to take the focus off him and what he might do/who he might be with.

Is it worth it, will it change anything right now? No.

Keep the focus on issues at hand--your home, your family, your job, you get my drift.

[theotherhalf]

maybe expecting the worst, facing reality, will help bring me to acceptance. Nothing else has...