I decided to start a thread on this topic since there isa a lot of questioning on whether DBing "works."
-I will know that I did my best and tried my hardest.
-It is psychologically healthy. Detaching and working on yourself are good things. GALing is a good thing.
-I will avoid making the same mistakes again (I hope).
-I have been able to see H w/compassion and I feel this is good for one's soul.
-It is good for co-parenting relationsihp. Even if H has hurt me more than anyone in my entire life, I can at least be civil and remember that I was not crazy for falling in love with him.
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D
Yes I agree I learned a lot from DB I could be happy and upbeat even if I felt like s$it I could practice happiness and it was a choice I could be hopeful as I healed seemed like their was hope I could act as if and yes it helped in all R even with my jack russell peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Hey Suit - where have you been my friend? Hope you are doing well.
IMP and Suit (my two favourite boy DBers) have got it pretty well covered - I think there is one more, and it may be particuarly for women - it teaches us that we don't have to be in a relationship to be happy, healthy and independent financially - nor does a relationship per se make you a more worthwhile parent, woman or friend. DBing has certainly given me the skills to be far more selective about who I date and why I date them. That's got to be a good thing.
V
Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
It works alright and as rightly indicated not always in the way we expect. Most come here looking for the magic pill thats going to save thier M as quickly as possible. What happens is that those that embrace the DB'ing concepts head on a journey of personal growth that will ensure them success in the future no mater what the eventual outcome of the M . in many cases some sort of relationship with the EX is maintained and where there are kids involved this is a good thing. Many find themselves moving on , some find new R with thier old spouses . But I think most win in some way.
Hi Virginia I'm right here. Don't spend too much time on this board these days. Been busy with my new website.
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Last edited by sgctxok; 07/30/0805:12 AM.
"It's better to have no spouse than have a bad spouse"
Virginia, if you got the link, go to the bottom of the homepage. You will find some interesting information on oragami. The fine art of Japanese paper folding.
"It's better to have no spouse than have a bad spouse"