I went to Cardnials Baseball game yesterday, day game with a friend, I scheduled a babysitter becasue W works at 4:30 and I didn't expect to get home until 6:00. When I did get home, D6 and D6 had a softball game so I took them to their game. I didn't speak to W all day and I had a great time.
W came to work this morning (watching the kids) and told me that everyone I met at thre ballgame stopped in at the bar she was working to say hi and let her know that they saw me.
I was pleasant and said have a nice day as I walked out the door this morning for work.
H4H I read the lighthouse posting wow
I need to talk to a lawyer about my W, I need to ask them about what I need to prepare for D, what and how I should document that W left me and the kids. I don't want W comming back in 3 months and changing her tune about wanting the kids. I need to ask about the house, can W force me and the kids out and what about my 401k, medical and auto insurance and some other custody issues. I don't want to be blindsided by a irrational person.
I need to keep moving forward with my life
Well "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" I hear whistling in my head. I'll find love again someday. I'm going to be happy, helpful, forgiving, patient and loving. I'm a stubborn old German.
We all have a long haul ahead of us, good or bad it's the path we choose in life that's important.
M45 W41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 Date I'll forgive W for A = never
[quote=JeffSTL I need to talk to a lawyer about my W, I need to ask them about what I need to prepare for D, what and how I should document that W left me and the kids. I don't want W comming back in 3 months and changing her tune about wanting the kids. I need to ask about the house, can W force me and the kids out and what about my 401k, medical and auto insurance and some other custody issues. I don't want to be blindsided by a irrational person. [/quote]
Jeff, man I'm sorry, I thought you had already done this. You need to get this done like YESTERDAY. Get someone GOOD, too (definitely family law) -- preferably someone who specializes in "men's rights" and father's custody issues.
Hey Puppy, I wanted to wait till W moved out, I knew I had some time, becasue it'll take some time before the excitement of her new place to wears off.
We all have a long haul ahead of us, good or bad it's the path we choose in life that's important.
M45 W41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 Date I'll forgive W for A = never
As you're starting to learn there are things that are coming into play NOW, that you want to have a good broad context of the legal ramnifications. Think of it like pre-year tax planning, vs. doing your taxes on April 14th, and you have one of those "OMG, so THAT's how it works! I wish I had done THUS-AND-SUCH!!"
Good luck Jeff. I am still thinking and praying for you.
Sara
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
I know you stopped posting for a short while, I haven't been posting much myself, especially on other peoples post. I'm sorry that I don't stop in more and say hi to everyone at least, but I've got a lot on my plate right now, hopefully after I see L I'll have some of my concerns answered.
I'm still going to give it one year, not just for W but for me, I have to get the house situated, move the girls into the big bedroom upstairs. I have to get a bedroom set for me, kids will be starting school end of summer, so I'll have to deal with that, I'm in no rush to get Divorced, and I'm not ready to start dating, so I'm sticking to my one year timeframe before I file for D, I will met with Lawyers to see if I should be doing anything or documenting anything, so I'll be welll prepared.
Again Sara, even if I do not post, I'm still thinking of you. I'm still trying to picture you, didn't you say you looked like Thelma from Scooby-Doo ???
Well "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" I hear whistling in my head. I'll find love again someday. I'm going to be happy, helpful, forgiving, patient and loving. I'm a stubborn old German.
We all have a long haul ahead of us, good or bad it's the path we choose in life that's important.
M45 W41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 Date I'll forgive W for A = never
W just called me at work and she was screaming about how D9 is out of control. Now D9 does have a attitude, especially when she has been gone (stayed overnight at friends house) nothing a good time-out won't fix and if she still has attitude, she can stay in her room away from the rest of us.
Told W I would rush home, so she can get out of there. I remained calm and I let her vent. She will bolt out of the hose as soon as I get home, I guarantee she will not be going to D9 softball game tonight. Thats ok we'll make a night out of it the kids and me. I feel sorry for my kids not having a mom that wants to be with them
We all have a long haul ahead of us, good or bad it's the path we choose in life that's important.
M45 W41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 Date I'll forgive W for A = never
I don't think you should rescue her when you get calls like this. If you do, I predict that they will come with increasing frequency in the days and weeks ahead. I think you should just validate her, listen, but DON'T go save her.
Ditto. She is their Mom and she needs to learn to act like it. You are being a good parent, we all can see that, but give her a chance to fix problems andI bet she will find her way there too.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
