Big thanks to Gyspy for mentioning that my thread was locked (on her thread) big kisses to you girlfriend!
Picked up D2 this morning. Met with D2, my Mom and MIL for breakfast. Was a nice visit!
D2 is currently napping so I thought I'd check in on all of you.. I have yet to post on Ali or Lisa's thread (I think) but WOW!!!!!!!!!!! Amazing movement going on in your relationships! Can I hear a WOO HOO?
H called on my way home from hometown. I didn't answer. Was feeling a bit tired from driving a lot this morning so wasn't sure I'd be "at my best" for the convo. He then sent me a text saying once again that he had a really good time with me yesterday. Which is lovely and all... but it wasn't a good enough day for him to ditch his friends and hang out with me for the evening. The lure of the game Rock Band followed by the bar scene was too strong. Oh well. I guess I still know where his priorities lie... or perhaps more accurately where they don't!
Good on you for not picking up when H called- that's good DB! It was nice of H to text, I agree. But do I detect a hint of expectation for him to spend the evening?
On the other hand, breakfast sounds super-fun! What did you have? I hope there was a big stack of pancakes somewhere!!
No date date for me.. just lots of appointments (aka dates) to attend to. Thought I'd just try the word out. Can't go there yet.. figure it gives the wrong message to me, to the kids, to jerk nose (name calling.. bad bad bad).
I have to admit recently I've ascribed negative names to Kevin when I think of him.. probably because I'm upset with his replies on the interrogatories. Grrrrrrrrr. Oh yes, this is where I remember the blessings. I wish him health. Hmm.. have to send more blessings to get out of this funk.
Let it go.. let it go... let it go!
"Which is lovely and all... but it wasn't a good enough day for him to ditch his friends and hang out with me for the evening."
I love how you're able to focus on the actions behind the words, rather than the words themselves. Does that help you in dealing with the situation?
Good for you, Ms Whey! How daunting was it to decide to sell the house? It's something I'm considering so I don't get stuck with all the work to move. Ours is a big house too.
It may have sounded like an expectation but it wasn't. I knew in my heart that he would choose to leave.. but I had "hoped" for the possibility of him picking me.
As for what I ate. I had french toast with strawberries.. but I gave most of the berries to D2 (because she LOVES them)!
First of all I want to state that I'm very happy that you are not banned. I would have really missed you!
As for the house decision. Please don't think that I don't have reservations because I do.. I will be very sad to leave this house. But the reality is that I can't do it all by myself and be the happy person I want to be. It takes a lot to upkeep this place all on my own.. Weeding, cutting the grass, seeding the grass, watering the grass, raking the leaves, shoveling the snow.. then there's the inside of the house (which I would need to take care of even in a condo), then there's working full time and being a parent. Where is there time for me? If you find that any of this echos your feelings I think it's something you should think about. The idea is almost freeing. I will choose where D2 and I live. I will allow H an opinion but realistically the choice is mine. I am in control of that (once I sell the house that is!!).
I hope my reasoning helps you some. You will know if it's the right choice for you. The key is to try to take the memories and emotional crutch out of the decision!
girl you sound so strong it's amazing! I am glad you are sticking to your plans and looking ahead. Your H is very attached to you girls, doesn't sound like a man who wants to divorce his wife and start a new life. I guess he needs what all WAS need :time.
Hi W2G! I agree with Kalni, there are still so many connections and good feelings between you, I cant see him being done with you at all. It IS a shame he chooses to go out with his mates, but then, until he makes the decision in his head to come back, he is still going to have that slight barrier there and want to go do his own thing, as thats why you guys are apart I guess. I have realised that these guys move slowly through their issues. I'm impressed with your strength and ability to move forward (not moing on right) with your plans for you and your D and where you might live.
Its so brilliant that he texts you to say he had a nice time with you, for all the seemingly positives in my sitch, I've never had that and I would be very pleased to receive that type of validation, which is what it is. He is reassuring you, I guess he wants you to wait for him to sort his cr*p out, I assume he would be mortified if you gave up or just met someone else!?
Ali xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
Thank you for pointing out the validation. I do appreciate the thought behind the text.. I just find when I look at his actions nothing really seems to have changed (in the sense that he's still SOOOO into himself).
Hello Everyone,
So to take out my frustrations in a useful manner I started moving around furniture today. I'm trying to lose a bit of furniture to help the living area look more sparse and therefore larger!!!!! Hoping this will help when I put the house on the market.
Not sure if anyone has any helpful advice but I've been having problems with ants lately. And it's driving me crazy. They are coming in under the baseboards in the kitchen.
Hope all of my American friends enjoyed their long weekends!
Did anyone out there catch the "Ugly Betty" finale?
If so, I just want to say how disturbed I am with Hilda's story line. Almost seems like they are glamorizing a bad thing (don't want to say too much in case someone out there has yet to watch the episode).
agggh don't post finales...poor me in Venezuela! We don't get them til July...damn time needed to insert subtitles!!!!!
In regards to the ants. CW68 is having the same problems. maybe you guys can compare note. I'd rather ants than cockroaches that love caracas streets...yuck.
I think you need to let him have his guy time. He'll outgrow it. My H is spending less time with friends now than he did early in the sitch. I think out drinking with the guys just gets boring after a while.
Jen
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
