For the guy with kids and WW II

[hopeful4her]

Locked it up.

Don't know how to add a link to the thread.

Never made it to church today. WW said she would stay with D's and D11's friend. The did not want to go to church. After I got ready for church, I remembered that service started 45 minutes earlier than usual. By the time I would have left to get there, I would have missed over an hour. Started to watch Joel Osteen with WW. He talked about embracing change. Ugh. Just my luck. A message that WW will skew to her liking. He talked about changes that happen in our lives. Work, relationships, how God stirs things up when all seems stagnant. Great. I can just see her taking it in. Moving on. Things change for the better. Welcoming a new season. Why were we watching this. I could see it in my sitch if she leaves me. But not in her sitch. I could see her starting to tear up. She must believe God put OM in her life. No matter what people think.

After the show, I cant hold it in. I ask her how she took the sermon. She says that change is good. I reply that change is good. I refer to her losing her job last July. The one that she worked with the single ho that taught her Myspace and going out and changed how she dressed and music she listened (I didnt say the last part to her, but she understood). WW agreed. It was better to get away from that job, as all the sudden her coworker she thought was her friend, was being mean to her for some reason. I refered to my losing my job of 19 years in 2004. It led to a much better job that I have now. Change can always be better. I tell her that God is even stirring things up between us. Yes, we were stagnant and He has stirred things up. We have changed and for the better. I am still changing, I tell her. He is still working on us. I tell her that I know that she is thinking that God has put people in our path. I tell her to remember one thing. Even Pastor has mentioned it. We know when it is God that has put things in our lives, because it will never go against biblical principal. He will never put things or have us do things that go against the teaching of the bible. WW is quiet. I end there. A little later we discuss what we are going to do for the day. I mention going back to the carnival for the last day. We go. Pick up some take away Chinese and I am telling her that the I really like the plants that she has gotten. I did not get any food for myself, so WW asks if I want to share with her. We share a little. She talks to me about what they are and tells me about the ones outside.

We have a blast at the carnival and we are riding all sorts of rides. I am not a ride person, but I am riding more rides than I have in 20 years. WW rides some rides I never would have thought. I am proud of her. She is so full of life. I see her suprised at me for riding some.

At home, we are winding down. WW and I try to nap on sofa. I wake up after a while and WW is making funnel cakes as we did not buy any today. She suggests dinner and I tell her I will do it. She lays down for nap with D6.

Another good day to me. I know she hears me. I just don't know if she listens.

I will keep up my faith, hope, love and kindness.

[hopeful4her]

See if this works.

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1421363&page=3#Post1421363

Doesn't look right. Maybe someone could do it for me?

[CBK]

H4H -

Can't help you with the thread, I just cut and past the link...

Sounds like a good day for you. Lot's of little messages in there - good and bad, seems like more good though. It sounds like communication is going well, just remember that don't have high expectations, she could slid back as well. Patience (funny I should say this) is the key my friend.

CBK

[whatdidido]

Yes, I agree with cbk. Be patient. She is listening, and I believe she is hearing whether she wants to or not. Keep strong.

[lodo]

Hey h4h,

To make the link, you want to type a square bracket [ then "url=http://your-url" then a closing square bracket ], then type the text to show on the page followed by [/url and then a closing square bracket ]. So the whole thing would look like this (but without spaces - I need to put them in so it'll show as text):

[ url=http://myurl ] My Url [/ url ].

lodo

[hopeful4her]

Last night, S14, WW and I ate a light dinner and watched a movie after we put D's to bed. I heated something up for myself and asked WW if she wanted some leftovers. She said yes and I heated them up for her. S14 wanted his own thing. WW sat in the middle of S and I on the sofa. After movie, S went to bed and WW and I talked a bit about the movie. I asked about another video we had and WW asked if I wanted to go ahead and watch it so we could return them all. WW had moved to an easy chair because she was working on her nails. Her neck started to hurt from all rides and we laughed a bit. We couldn't finish the movie and took showers and went to bed.

This morning we get up a little late. D6 will not wake up so WW decides that S14 and D6 can stay at home today. I get D11 going and make breakfast. I make myself some lunch and ask WW if she wants anything. She agrees and help making her lunch. We decide on dinner and I notice she is very stiff. Her neck is very bad and I find the Theragesic. I ask if she wants some and she says it smells too bad. Dang. I know, what kind of detaching have I been doing. In my mind, I am just doing acts of kindness. I'm not going crazy. I don't think. I did pay for everthing this weekend. Her new tires, new brakes and the carnival for all of us. We are being very nice to each other. At least I have that.

Like I said, not a bad day considering I sort of instigated an R talk and nearly preached to her, yesterday.

We'll see how this day finishes out.

[CBK]

Good job H4H - you seem to be in a good place right now. The other day my W's neck was killing her, it took all my strength to ask her if she wanted me to rub it. Keep a hold of what you can.

Stay away from the R talk - it only takes us down. It sounds like you were able to walk away, but be careful.

CBK

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Theragesic = GOOD

If you would've rubbed her neck (or offered to) = BAD

Ya done fine.

[sideswiped2]

I know it doesn't seem like it but it is a good thing she is still at home. My h left before I knew what was going on - good old abandonment!!! Moved in with ow. But since he left he has become so cold, you would think i was a one night stand not a 16 year relationship. Keep persevering! Being so close to each other is keeping her attached. Keep with dbing otherwise she will walk all over you.

Stay strong.

[hopeful4her]

I know. But me wanny touchy so bad. Be strong. Be nice and not give a damn at the same time. Am I coming or going?

It almost feels like it wasn't an R talk, but a long drawn out "truth dart". I keep wanting to spout a short one off, but never seem to get one in at an opportune time. Most times, when I want to, it feels out of place. I'm sure it is just me. I do so many stupid things concerning DB. I have terrible timing.