Mama never seemed to miss the finer things in life. If she did she never did say so to Daddy. She never wanted to be more than mother and a wife. If she did, she never did say to Daddy. The only thing that seemed to be important in her life, was to make our house a home and make us happy. Mama never wanted any more than what she had. If she did, she never did say so to Daddy. He often left her all alone; but she didn't mind the stayin' home. If she did, she never did say so to Daddy. And she never missed the flowers and the cards he never sent her. If she did, she never did say so to Daddy. Being took for granted, was a thing that she accepted. And she didn't need those things to make her happy. And she didn't seem to notice that he didn't kiss and hold her. If she did, she never did say so to Daddy. One morning we awoke, just to find a note, that mama carefully wrote and left to Daddy. And as he began to read it, Words that she had written there to Daddy She said the kids are old enough, they don't need me very much, And I've gone in search of love I need so badly. I have needed you so long, But I just can't keep holding on. She never meant to come back home. If she did, she never did say so to Daddy.
Author Unknown
Trying to stay happy as my heart gets ripped out. Looking for love and affection (getting little or none).
M45 W41 M10 years D9, D6, D6, S5 2 Dogs and 1 Cat OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me PA confirmed 03/08 and still going ???
...now i'm crying uncontrollably. that feels like it will be me in 15 years. only i did say something, over and over, just goes unheard. and it will still be a surprise to him when it happens.
...now i'm crying uncontrollably. that feels like it will be me in 15 years. only i did say something, over and over, just goes unheard. and it will still be a surprise to him when it happens.
Ditto. Only at this moment today, I have hope.
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
My wife left me 10 days ago for the second time in 3 years(she moved to another town an hour away). Short story, I never forgave her for leaving and moving in with another man the first time, and I was a jerk.
I have been thinking about it a lot, what I did, what she said, what I didn't say and really tried to see things from HER perspective. Here is what I wrote.
My Wife's POV
I have agonized over this for months and I just can't take it anymore. Things will never change. He said they would and they didn't. He will never forgive me and he will never love me again. I have said I am sorry so many times and he just slaps it back in my face. He just keeps punishing me. Why can't he see how I feel? How much I love him? How much this hurts me?I can't live like this anymore. My heart is broken and my hope is gone. I just can't take the pain anymore. This is the hardest thing I have ever done, but I have to leave. I can't live like this any more. Nothing is ever good enough for him. I know this will hurt my girls, but if I don't leave I might hurt myself or lose my sanity. I have tried for almost 3 years now to save this marriage, to make it work, to make up for my mistake. I have been in this relationship for 15 years and enough is enough. I have done every thing I can, every thing he asked, every thing he wanted and more. Nothing mattered. Nothing worked. NOTHING was good enough for him. It is time to go. I LOVE my girls and it will be devastating to me to only be able to see them every couple of weeks, but the pain of not seeing them everyday will be a lot less than the pain of going home to a man who doesn't love me, doesn't want me, doesn't respect me, and never will. I loved my husband, I wanted to be with him forever, but it's time for me to leave, mend my broken heart, be happy and learn to live again.
So that is what I came up with. When I first wrote it yesterday, I read it through and I didn't like myself very much. I sat at my computer and cried for awhile.
Anyway, I saw my WAW today and I asked her to read it and tell me how well I did at capturing her POV. Her eyes started to water and she said "That's it. 99.9%, thats exactly how I felt" All I could do was to tell her I was sorry.
My point of this is, a lot of people don't know how to tell there spouse how they are really feeling and they end up where they feel leaving is the only option. I'm not saying it is, but thats how they feel.
my $.02
Cool link-->DANCING ALIEN Read and relate-->MY THOUGHTS
This post just inspired me to post one of my WAW's poems that she wrote recently before we sold the home we built together and went separate ways:
Sunset, Sunset So warm upon my face Sunset, Sunset such a relaxing, calm embrace Sunset, Sunset pour the warth upon my face Sunset, Sunset I'm sorry I've ignored you Sunset, Sunset I certainly do adore you Sunset, Sunset my cries will linger on Sunset, Sunset forever on my mind Sunset, Sunset Its time to leave you behind Sunset, Sunset Although it may not be this time or place Sunset, Sunset One day, I know once again, I'll look forward to seeing your face
Needless to say it made me sad and cautiously optimistic at the same time but that this seems like it is going to be a long road
About a week later, I wrote a poem for the new owners of our home to let them know how special the house was to us (we both felt like we sold a little bit of our soul when we sold the house)
Here it is:
Designed from The dreams of two Built on The hope of more Lived in With the love of four
Anyways just felt like sharing
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
