I went out last night and again this afternoon. Before he left for work he came up to me and apologized. Said he knows he shouldn't be on me about anything right now but that he has always viewed everything I do as manipulation and its hard for him to let go of that. I didn't say anything. Just nodded.
Me BS 30 Him WH 32 Kids 9, 4 and 2 Together 12 years DDAY#1 9/30/05 False reconciliation DDAY #2 3/13/08 blindsided
Next time he calls you a heartless b*tch, you need to walk away from him. I hope you already do that. Calling a woman a b*tch (at least where I come from) is about the worst verbal abuse language you can say to a woman. That is awful that he does that to you.
What does this mean exactly?
Quote:
OW threaten to tell me everything
So are you separating for sure? Just trying to catch up on your thread...
It means that if he left her, she would tell me about their affair.
Ye, we a separating for sure. That was his decision. He is blazing forward and not looking back. He is still at home but sleeping on the couch. We need to get a second car, tell the kids, and sort out a few other things. I think he just wants me to deal with it all and then he'll just walk out the door and be free.
Last edited by stillbreathing; 04/02/0811:13 PM.
Me BS 30 Him WH 32 Kids 9, 4 and 2 Together 12 years DDAY#1 9/30/05 False reconciliation DDAY #2 3/13/08 blindsided
Ye, we a separating for sure. That was his decision. He is blazing forward and not looking back. He is still at home but sleeping on the couch
Quote:
I guess I should be more clear with everyone here, and myself. WH does not just want a separation. He wants a divorce. Period.
Yes, this is my life too. H has been on the couch since last July. I am so sorry. Don't ask him what he wants anymore, because he will just have to repeat his stock answer, which he probably doesn't mean.
I'm sorry you are going through this too, lwb. I did start to read your thread but have not gotten to the end yet. It sucks. I still want to wake up and find it was all just a nightmare.
I got a book out of the library about the long term effects of divorce on children. I am a child of divorce and it actually helped me to understand some things about myself! For me, the knowledge is comforting and if this is something I have to go through with my children, I would rather be prepared and know what sort of issues I will be dealing with and how i can help them.
Should i share the book with him? Not like "here, you better read this" but more along the lines of "There is a book on children and divorce in my nightstand if you are interested in reading it." Is that a good idea or a bad idea?
Me BS 30 Him WH 32 Kids 9, 4 and 2 Together 12 years DDAY#1 9/30/05 False reconciliation DDAY #2 3/13/08 blindsided
I don't think right now would be a time to share it with him. Maybe he'll see it on his own if you leave it out...
My H went from "The kids will be fine, they'll be happy if we are happy" (when divorced) to finally seeing that this will be devastating on them. But I know he still wouldn't be open to reading a book. I am like you, I want to read all I can, be prepared, if needed.
My IC gave me this link to look at, its books and workbooks...
I can't leave it out because the kids don't know. My 9yo is a voracious reader and will pick up any book in his path.
I think he would be open to reading it. He's a good dad. I do think he wants wants best for the kids but is just in denial about the big picture. I don't want to be all in his face about it though. Well, actually, yes I do want to be in his face but I'm trying not to!
Thanks for the link.
Me BS 30 Him WH 32 Kids 9, 4 and 2 Together 12 years DDAY#1 9/30/05 False reconciliation DDAY #2 3/13/08 blindsided
Karen