Don't we all have a place where things went over the line? Where there is a point of no return? I'm not convinced that you won't change your mind again...but then again, you may have met your breaking point. Again, time will tell on that one.
I've reached my limit. I knew it soon after my last post and in the weeks that have followed, I know it for sure. My soft heart for my husband is dead. I'm sad about the death, but also excited about a new future without all the pain and cruelty that my husband has handed me for way too long.
I don't know what it's like to be in your shoes, Fish. I do know that we are never sure until time gives us the final answer. Until time passes, please try not to bring another person into the pain.
{{{HUGS}}}
M: ten years BS23, BS17 Step-SS20, SS16, SS14 Separated: August 07
The reason why I have continued to post is that we all have had a bond for about 7 months and I did not want to leave you guys hanging.
One door closes and another opens, it happens. Everyone has a tipping point, I reached mine. I have known this new chick for over 8 years, there were feelings there for a long time which I did not act upon. Now, it's time to move on. She was there for me during a very dark moment and asked for nothing in return.
We have some connection that I feel I must explore.
Fish The crowd is giving tough love. They understand tipping points just do not tip onto the freeway infront of the mac truck. Many here have done it and their Tshirts got tread marks to show for it.
I've been spanked by this crowd and they use a paddle with holes in it though painful their motives pass muster.
"All I want is a weeks pay for a day's work" Steve Martin
Duck fish, the endorphins are coming, the endorphins are coming! I've been where you are heading, fish! I know what it was like to sit across from the sweetest little thing on the planet and watch her eyes fill with tears while she says "I hurt so badly inside for you". I heard words like "you are such a strong man, I can't imagine how you've lived the way you have for so many years, you just amaze me" OMG, talk about feeling connected! It is so powerful to make this kind of connection when you are feeling so hurt, betrayed and undesirable. But fish, ya know what, it can turn so quickly that your head will spin. Then you'll find yourself grieving the loss of your M (and you will grieve that loss) and at the same time be crushed by the loss of your friend. You are not emotionally ready to deal with that if it happens, none of us are if we're on this board. Fish if this woman is worth your time she will still be there, as will the chemistry, six months from now. Lastly, if you want good relations with your ex (and you do) for the sake of raising your child don't mess around with her friend at this point, it's a bad, bad move. I trust you will take this as a love tap and not a 2 X 4! I can't seem to find where I put that darn thing
Thanks so much for your heartfelt concern, it is much appreciated.
Everyone has a point where they say "No Mas." It's over.
I reached mine and now I am committed to moving on with my life. Why waste another 6 months? It's time to start living again.
I did everything possible to save my marriage. I treated my W like a queen and she spit in my face. So, that's the end of that.
Quite honestly, I have spent very little time thinking about her at all. There have even been days this week that were W-free - absolutely no thoughts whatsoever. I guess she has been flushed from my system.
As far as the new chick goes, we do not talk about this sh*t at all. She does not need to "sell me" and give me pitches how she will take the pain away. The pain is gone. This is the best I have felt in a long time. I also know that we absoltuely would walk away as friends if the romance faded. Just the way it is.
perhaps, but your statement from a few pages back of the LBS is now the WA is the 2nd post I've seen recently that proclaims themselves as the WA. However, unless your wife truly wants you then you are both just LBS, you have just chosen a different path. I understand your hurt and the thought of "the pain is gone". I am struggling today and I suppose it would be easier to just be done with it. However, 6 months for me is not long enough...
Quote:
Why waste another 6 months? It's time to start living again.
ummm why...i think you could answer this if you really tried. And by saying time to start living again, how much of GAL were you doing during the 6 months? Is a new R going to make you feel "living again". Better remember that you must be happy with yourself, another person will enhance your happiness, but they cannot create it for you.
Just thoughts...regardless, make sure you do what is best for children. Keep them in your heart and really think about that before you jump in the lake without boats, oars, life-vests, etc...
