Heartsick Over The Big D

[lovelyolive]

A lot of us want to thank our X's for Ding us, if you can believe it. Unfortunately, it's a painful process to get to this point.

It's comforting to hear someone say this..

KL- It sounds like we are on about the same calendar as far as the D being final. In a way, it'll be good to finally move on with life but so sad, like so many others, that it had to turn out this way. I've found that I'm finally able to get myself out and really start to GAL... Something I couldn't find it in me to do while stuck in limbo while H tried to make up his mind. Anyway, this is helping me find the real me that I seem to have lost over the years. It's liberating really. Try it...

I think it's ok to be bitter for a while just don't let it take over your life forever.

[BryanS]

Wow, my post sounded so immature and bitter.

I still feel that way though.

Yeah, it's good to admit to it. Personally, I find that I'm better off when I admit to feeling bitter for a little bit than trying to pretend I'm happy all the time.

[bright_new_day]

I requested a brand new last name in my petition, something that I just picked out of the air because I liked the sound of it. That way, I don't have H's last name as an albatross around my neck. It's my way of really starting fresh.

I went back to maiden name after 22 years of being Mrs. X. I knew he was going to marry his OW, so I didn't want to share a name with them. I gave it back because I knew he would give it to her. Good luck to her!

[Kimmie Lee]

Thanks you guys.

And what am I doing for me? Well, just living, I guess. That's something.

I went bowling with a bunch of my friends Saturday and had a great time. Hardly thought about H at all. It was a blast. This Saturday, I'm taking a road trip by myself up to Canada to see some relatives. It's about a 10 hour drive, but I'll enjoy it.

[Kimmie Lee]

H canceled my cell service without warning. I called to ask him what happened and he said, "You got greedy." H was pissed because my lawyer requested more spousal support.

Wow, I guess I finally know how to get H's attention. LOL!!

[cat03]

wow! dork, better get your own with your name in the acct, it meant I had to pay more but I'm glad I have my cell under my name only.
Hope you get what you are asking for KL

[Kimmie Lee]

Thanks cat.

I told H I never asked him to pay for my cell in the first place, he offered to. I then asked if he would please give T-Mobile permission for me to use my same # for a new account, and he said ok.

Well, it was a big hassle when I went to the cell kiosk to get things sorted out, but H never reactivated my phone so that I could get it changed. To add insult to injury, I find out that he is paying for several others on our cell service plan! Probably his GF and her two brats. Funny how H can afford them but not his own wife.

I really don't get why H should be mad just because my lawyer is looking out for me. H is the one who started the D ball rolling and now there is no stopping it. What the hell did he think would happen? Does this idiotic WAS think that I should not have any rights of my own?

I will now go for the maximum that I possibly can get. H should be ashamed of himself.

[bright_new_day]

I really don't get why H should be mad just because my lawyer is looking out for me. H is the one who started the D ball rolling and now there is no stopping it. What the hell did he think would happen? Does this idiotic WAS think that I should not have any rights of my own?

I will now go for the maximum that I possibly can get. H should be ashamed of himself.

Yes, they do think that they can walk away without being responsible for the spouse they left behind anymore. How greedy and selfish of you to expect anything from him.
Mine sat in mediation, trying to impress the mediators, saying he would do whatever he could to help me financially, that if he could he would buy me a house, but when it came down to it, he tried to screw me on everything. He said no matter how many days he had the kids per year, he would pay the maximum child support, then made sure not to. You need to listen to your lawyer and take care of yourself...he will not take care of you.

[newnamenewlife]

I'm just checking this board out for the first time--I am on the MLC board most of the time. My H still lives at home, but seems hell-bent on S and then D. I noticed that some of you talk about giving back H's last name if you took it. I never changed my name, but I wonder all the time about what I'd do with my wedding and engagement rings and all the jewelry H has given me, not to mention the alomst 20 years of photos of us and our family.

Just curious about that aspect of it. Sorry to interrupt!

[bright_new_day]

noticed that some of you talk about giving back H's last name if you took it. I never changed my name, but I wonder all the time about what I'd do with my wedding and engagement rings and all the jewelry H has given me, not to mention the alomst 20 years of photos of us and our family.

My rings are in a box....I don't really know what to do with them. I did give D17 the promise ring X had given me when I was 17 years old with the promise that I would always be there for her. I think I am going to make photo albums for the kids with all of the pictures.