Out of the house for about 2 1/2 months. We talk a little better, civil, I just started to read the DBing book. Need help figuering out the 180 move. Spouse still pushing for the big D. What should I do? should I stall for the D or move foward? I say that I love her and all she says is "I know" I asked her if she still loved me, she said that I coused to much pain, broke her heart and doesnt want to feel pain no more. Is there still hope?
Hi larger,sorry for you being here!Good place though.You have to stop saying i love you!!The part about the pain I heard the same thing too.You have to stay focused.Read the books and think about what you can do to improve on yourself.Keep your chin up your not done yet.Talk to you soon> Tom
Me:42 W:41 Married 22 seperated12-31-07,served papers 2-29-08 S21-S20 partialy disabled S17 Divorce sighed 10-7-08 final 90 days after
I got the smae thing from my wife about her just saying I know when I said I loved her and tom is right it helped when I stopped saying it. Hang in there.
Me 36 W 36 S 15 D 12 M 16 Bomb Nov 07 WAS Feb 08 My Sitch http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1376213&page=0&fpart=1
Thanks a lot. This helps out a lot. Its a new day and you are right, I have to start improving on myself. Then things should start to improve. There is still hope, and thats good!
I agree, stop saying I love you. Don't pressure, pursue, beg etc. and don't have relationship talks. Also don't defend yourself when she confronts you. Instead agree. Whether you agree or not that you hurt her what matters is that she is hurt. Could you give a little more information? What are her complaints? This will help you to identify areas to change for your 180. What are your goals?
Posts Role Reversal(original) WAW now LBS part I & II WAW now LBS part III(current) T: 9 yrs M: 8 yrs WAW: Sep 06-Jul 07 LBS: Sep 07-pres.
did not help out around the house. did not spend that much time with the boys. there was some infedalaty, on my part, no intercource. Thats what put her over the edge.
lager we are all here for ya man. my wife says the same things, a real on the fence girl. but the fact shes on that fence is something. dont move forward with the D. if she wants it and you dont, let her do the work.
thanks for all the support! I am letting her make the move of the divorce. As of yet she has not pulled the trigger. As for the 180, its very hard to do, but if I want it, I must keep doing it. I am also making myself happyer by doing things that I enjoy. It's hard to not to think of her, but like they say, the show must go on! that my life, IT MUST GO ON! thanks a Mill for all the support!
any time my friend this is were you are safe to vent. if you need guidance ( and belive me there are better people then me on here lol) you WILL find it.
