Prepared supper and sat down to chat with W. She asked me why I was so nice to her and I seemed so aggressive earlier. I answered that in spite of what we are going through, my feelings for her have not changed (notice I did not say "I love you") that is why I am nice to you. As far as the aggressive stuff, I did not have a great day and i apologized if i brought it (my mood) in the home. We spole about the house and possible scenarios for the sale or her buying me out etc. She really wants to keep it. If I could I would give her a great deal on it. i am already taking a hit but I wonder if she even realizes it. Anyway, she was alot friendlier even sitting next to me on the couch and sharing a few laughs. Does this mean everything is fine between us? No, but i know that my mood greatly affects hers. I am so aware of her actions (regardless of how small) that I can tell when she is softening up. She even reminisced about one of our trips pre D7.
I often wonder how I can be so friendly now.. 'cause you would think we LBS would kind of be rude and abrupt... but it is SO much easier to handle this DBing stuff when there are civil interactions..
When are you moving again? At the end of this week?
I am struggling with friendliness right now but do I / we have a choice?
I found out yesterday that my apt will be ready by the middle of next week. Unless a minor miracle happens, I will be there at the latest next weekend.
Sorry I haven't been here for you lately. I've had my head up my you know where. It sounds like you are doing well. I like that you are looking forward to golf with D7. My S10 loves golf. I used to be good at it, but other passions have taken up too much of my time. Now I'm just good enough to get upset when I play bad. I either need to give it up or get good at it again. Sort of like my marriage.
Keep killing her with kindness. I'm convinced it freaks them out. It does my W.
Woog, don't worry about it...the ladies took up the slack while you were tending to your......your.....head (there you go). I will show W my kindness from afar in a couple of days....something inside me tells me that this move is more final than I care to admit. Anyhow just to recap W has till July 1 at the latest to decide whether she wants (or can afford to) to buy the house. The house is on the market be but we agreed that it would take a hell of an offer for us to sell it. She really wants to stay put (I guess that is good) just not with me. I feel I need to take a step back to perhaps move forward somewhere down the road....I guess I am taking a gamble. We shall see but it is obvious that the status quo (good mood etc., living in the same house) has not resulted in what i would call "real" progress .
Some days I swear I heard a few clearing their throats.
As far as golf is concerned, it's all about expectations. I am a single digit handicap, my two golfing buddies are 12 and 20....we still all have a good time together and we all try to improve.
W announced that she was going out for supper with some new girlfriends (which i have met) on Friday night. Looks like I will need to GAL this weekend because I don't think W will be around much.
Spring break next week for D7 and of course moving day for me.
Last night was rather calm. W was again closer than she has been recently. Good conversation, no relationship talk. She did suggest that I not eat a desert at one point. I guess it is just reflex on her part. Some physical conatct...nothing sexual (if and when this does happen, I will last all of 60 seconds due to the anticipation). I can sense that she is fighting this with all her will power. Anyhow she gave me her weekend schedule and as anticipated, I am not part of it. She will probbaly include me on Sunday for a movie with D7. This kind of stuff used to bother me quite a bit. Now, it's not as important to me. This AM., an evaluator for the bank is here (for her mortgage) and W seems to be bossing me around quite a bit (clean this etc.) like in the good old days. In conclusion, what I am trying to say is that sometimes W does not seem to act like she knows what is about to transpire (seperation , divorce etc.). At other times she seems to be very focused. All this within sometimes in the same day. Patience and one day at a time. I have to admit I am encouraged regarding last night. The eyes don't lie.
Sounds as if w if in MLC with all the back and forth. With my h there was no back and forth - just back and back.
While you have nothing to do this weekend, you might join some of the rest of us in prayer and fasting on Sun. Check out The Prayer Circle Forum. Thinking of ya. LadyDi
Lousy weekend for me....W has done her best to stay away and keep busy. It looks like she has plans for this week (afternoons) with D7 (spring break) I am not involved. As a matter of fact she even went as far as saying that she has a supper on Thursday with all her girls. This morning we had a talk about money which she is burning real fast. She informed me that she is possibly going to Mexico (again) with her new friends on march 11th.... if she could get a flight. My guess is it is booked already. Let's see...that would make it 5 times (1 week) from May 2007 to May 2008 plus a week or so in Orlando with the family. Houston we have a problem. This is definately the straw. Of course all this is said matter of factly as if there is nothing wrong with what she is doing and oh by the way take good care of D7 while I am gone (oh and if you can not, I'll ask my mom). My apt. will be ready on Thursday...no doubt where I will be sleeping this Thursday and next weekend...after that it depends on whether the jetsetter she gets a flight because there is no way D7 will spend a week with MIL in my house. There you have it ....what a recap....needless to say i feel like s... right now.
