I agree with Woog that you and your daughter have to continue to be your focus..
I am curious to see how much your wife will seek you out once you are separated though.. It's tough on both the WAS and the LBS initially when you separate. Kind of a shock to the system to not see the person every day anymore... but you will have some breathing room and I hope it helps you to detach some.
Woog and W2, you guys are right D7 needs to be my number one prority. I need to get W off of the podium behind me and maybe even my parents who are real saints (no offence to the religious folks). I have always put everyone ahead of me and probably will for a the rest of my life. I get that from the saints I spoke about earlier. I will keep you posted on my W's contacts once I am seperated. W and i watched a little tv together tonight. Spoke mostly about her experience snowboarding...she is sore all over. Said goodnight while touching my hand. Like Woog a few days ago, I am pretty emotional tonight. This isn't ging to get easier any time soon I am afraid.
This A.M saw an old large piece of luggage in the kitchen. I asked jokingly if she was sending me a message. At least she laughed about it. Her oldest daughter finally brought it back....apparently she borrowed it a while ago. Out of the blue, W asked me where my wedding ring was (smile on her face). I answered that it was on the counter. I then asked why she asked me this. Again she laughed and said no reason. She then said i don't have mine on because I just put on some hand cream. All very strange.....but what else is new. Well at least wife is in a good mood, for what it's worth. As usual W gets angry and 24hrs. later she calms down. Happy Monday to everyone.
More discussions this evening regarding my move and the timing of it. W still thinks she will buy me out. I hope she can. We will see in the next couple of months. She has a few things on her mind and one of them is me. However, I feel she has moved on. I am anxious to see what transpires after the move. It is imperative that I keep very busy. Also important that I show W that I can move on without her. Most importantly I need to be a rock for D7 and have her best interests are my number one priority. I can't wait for the snow to melt, this is going to be a heck of a golf season......watch out Tiger here I come. D7 has some clubs, I think I will spend some time at the course with her also.
Oh I am so jealous! I want to be a good golfer. Not even great, I would love to just be non-embarrassing at golf! Maybe I can add that to my GAL plan.
You say W has moved on. People who have fully moved on don't care where your wedding ring is. They don't even notice if you are wearing it or not. So I think she isn't all the way out the door emotionally yet.....just my opinion. Thanks for all the helpful advice. Think tonight I will go to bed before 1 a.m. what a miracle..
if you want to improve at golf there is only one avenue....practice and patience...there we go with that patience again.
You are probably right about W not being totally out yet. However, it's one thing to not be totally out....how much is she still in? I know this will take time or maybe never happen, but the goal is all in....anything less is not acceptable in a relationship (as far as I am concerned).
I read a few responses from SGTX to other people and one that struck me (which I have never been able to do) is the "not be as available / be a little secretive" angle. I will need to do some of that. I also notice that W listens to what I am saying on the phone, even while she was blow drying her hair.
More snow on the way in my neck of the woods today and tommorow.
Yes, patience is a recurring theme these days, isn't it?
I agree, I want my H to be "all in" but at this point I have decided to settle for "not all OUT" b/c I am just not ready to give up. Saturday I thought I was. But now I know I am not. So give yourself time, too. You may want to quit today but change your mind tomorrow....Ultimately, though, I agree. Our spouses have to get to an "All In" mentality for this to work. It is up to us to decide how long we are willing to wait. Guess I have decided to wait a little longer... Hope you are having a good day!
W is pretty much planning her Friday night with friends and next week (spring break). I guess that is the difference between her and me. She is getting a life and I am stuck in neutral. I am just waiting for the apt. to be vacated to make a move. I will probably be back at the house for a week when W makes her 4th trip to Mexico in one yr. I checked her passport and she was not in Europe but in Mexico in January. At this point it does not really matter but I did make a crack about her going to see her latin lover which she did not like. I need to move on....not give up but change strategy. I don't think I am ready to give up yet but a change of scenery will do me good. Maybe a little darkness will also help the w realize what is going on. We will see what happens and I will keep you posted.
Maybe I can add that to my GAL plan.
