I, like Ronmom, sometimes feel like I don't belong here - I'm just trying to keep the pieces together that are left. I'm nowhere near piecing anything more back together. But you are all so wonderful to me and have been so very, very helpful - I need you all right now.
I just found out that Dump Scum (OW) REALLY has left her h & kids and is all set up in her own little apartment all by herself! Exactly how can you leave your kids? Real trash, I'd say. Maybe I'm just a little jaded, but.....
How am I not going to go bonkers now? This opens up a whole new field of opportunity for my H. ARRRGGGGGGG!!!! I need you guys to keep me on the straight and narrow. I haven't put in 11 months to screw it up now!
Sue Ann, Hey there!! Hang in there. Yes, it may seem like more doors of opportunities are being openend with Dump Scum leaving her kids, H and having her own little apt. BUT this may also be what really scares your H away from her too! She may start to become real clingy and pushy and demanding of his time. Remember, my H's ow doesn't have her kid either and doesn't choose to live near her d because she "hates that town" and she lives in an apt paid for by my H and her brother!! Talk about open door oportunities!! BUT my H did come home and he is still home... not that all is great, but ... guess what I am saying is try not to react before you have the facts on how your H is going to react. I know I am guilty of basing my H's feelings/beliefs based off of the OW's behaviors (writing him love letters, calling all the time, etc...) and not on what HE is showing me. Continue to act as if!! You are doing a fantastic job! You'll know when enough is enough! Okay, I am not giving a lot of advice, I just want to give some support and a big cyberhug! Your H may not be able to make any real decisions until he gets through this transition time with retirement and the other stuff going on with him (with the psych and union and all that jazz). So at any rate, hang in there. Take care of Sue Ann. And keep posting here!!!
I know how you feel. You are probably thinking that he is going to be able to spend a lot more time with dump scum, right? If, he does, this could be good. He could get to see what she is really made of a lot sooner. The infatuation will wear off much quicker. He may ask himself the same question about her in regards to the kids. Who knows, maybe he has already asked himself this. Maybe, she will realize that she would rather go back to her H and kids.
Keep doing what you have been doing. I think that your H still has a thing for you by some of the posts I have read. Don't let her move into apt. make you backslide.
Hey Sue Ann, I just wanted to check in on you. I think Step-by-Step is right that this development may work in your favor. The faster you can hand her the rope, the quicker she will hang herself. Nothing will scare a MLC'er faster than a person saying I have given up everything for you and now what's your move.
You know the drill, be calm, be cool, be detached. Do what he least expects. All easier said than done.
I have got to run. But, I just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you.
Thanks everyone! Made it through day one of knowing about this. Of course, H never went anywhere, so it was pretty easy???? Keep up the support - I need it right now. You guys are great!
Keep up the support - I need it right now. You guys are great!
