well, all hell broke loose, it is over and done

[cat03]

guys, boy, where to start? I'll just ramble and hopefully I'll make sence
Tonight I find a receipt for a cell phone from dec 11, a new phone i didnt' know about, I have a friend call, it's a cell with my H's voice and as the message he leaves ow's pet name for him.
OK, long story short, I go to confront him, to make sure he was with her before doing anything, he toldme he was doing something for work, nope, he's at her house.
I knocked forever, finally ow opens telling he ...get this: jumped out of the window...2nd story balcony, why I ask ow says "you scared the hell out of him", I call her to come outside to talk with him, I tried to get a hold of him, I see him by the bushes but, alas!! he runs away, yup, runs his legs off, even as I told him I know it's him, to come face me.. nothing.....
I talk briefly to ow, at the begining whenI was home I was ready to raise WWIII, but my friend talks me down, telling me I'm the wife she is the whore and not to stoop to her level. I wasn't supposed to even go up to her appt, but the thought of him sleeping soundly while I'd be going nuts at home changed my mind, so Iknocked. She basically doesnt' care he is married, as far as she know it is over with me, I motioned to the direction he runned and ask her if she doesn't mind a lying coward, she says "he's cool w/me".
Hmmmm, I"m calm during the whole thing, she is just a sad tool he used, so I got no beef with her, neither him nor her deserve anything, not even an insulf from me. I just tell her calmly that we were together the whole time, going to counceling, trying to make things work, she asks me if I still wanted him, I say I wastn' sure, prob not. I tell her good luck, to watch out for his lies and bye, she actually has the nerve to tell me "nice meeting you" to which I reply "sorry I can't say the same", she says "i thought you'd say that".. smart ass.
I faced her, and she's got nothing on me, he wants that wretched woman with no morals and hasn't the balls to face me? then, it is HIS loss, not mine.

He is a looser, the good man I married is truly dead and gone and with him every shred of decency. The money he told me was for the car repair he owed her she didn't see a dime of it, the money for tonight's work related outing, gone, prob dining and having a good time.

Guys, the only silver lining I see , is , that i finally know what kind of man he is, he is worthless, not worth even one tear. I'm prob in shock, or God is keeping me sane, after the initial shaking of my whole body when I found the receipt, I'm fine. I deserve a man who loves me and respects me and would give himself to him, because that's what i had to offer that coward, I was giving him my all, wanted to grow old with him and love him like no one else.
He's the looser, good riddance. i'm sure I'll cry and come appart at some point, I'll be going to our old MC as soon as I can, he knew everything, he was a source of so muc support and peace for me (and even for him at some point)

I know my heart will break for the kids, they will have to suffer for that son of a b*tch, my precious gorgeous childrem will prob suffer for this coward, I pray I'm a good parent and may they never lack anything.

I don't know what to do right now though, run to a lawyer? I dont' have that kind of money and don't know if it is the thing to do. Wait for him to call? for what? to tell me: ok, I'll give you a D if that's what you want" just like last time?
I know this, I will not, will NOT be fooled again, I dont think I have it in me to give him one more chance, both times i took him back he never really tried to make it up for me, I was not worth his time nor efford, what do i want a man like that for?

Pray for a wise desicion, praise be the Lord for the peace I have now, I do hope is peace and not shock, dont' know, but, there it is.

PS< please, all of you newbies, not all are horror stories like mine, the man I married is a pretty disturbed individual with no personality, love for himself, direction nor sence of right or wrong, dont' think this will also may happen to you, I"m more the exception than the rule :P

I dont' work tomorrow, of course, so I won't have much access to the internet, but I will check at night for sure and will try to take my princess to the library and I'll come by for the support which I know you'll offer, you all are worth gold, thanks for listening))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[sgctxok]

Hi Cat....

I'm so sorry. Gosh...I love how strong and positive you are.

Father, you can take every situation and turn it around for the good of those who love you. Thank you for giving Cat wisdom and strength and guidance and eyes to see.

I praise you for her...and know you've given her everything plus you to help her with her parenting. Let her feel you with her every step of the way.

Help us to support her. Place everyone who can help her in her path. Thank you for providing an abundance of every good thing...please open every door so everything is in easy reach for her.

Father, Cat has such a generous heart and spirit. Thank you so much for this, and for bringing her to this board.


Amen.

[jnutcurl]

Cat,

I am so sorry for what you are going through. You deserve so much better than that. Imagine a grown man jumping out off of a balcony and hiding in the bushes, I dont know if it was an appropriate response, but you had me laughing so hard. You sure must be tougher than you think you are to scare the man so much. You will make it and enjoy the peace you feel at this moment in time. We can't ask much more than being able to say we have found the inner peace and knowledge that we are better than that. I am sure things will be hard for a few days but hopefully knowing will give you some clarity to the situation. I will be thinking of you.

[Sara]

Wow Cat!! Unbelievable. What a coward! Like a 10 year old boy. Yes, it's time to stop loving him like you've never been hurt. I'm sorry your children will suffer from growing up in a broken home, but you have tried everything and then some. It is time for self-preservation. Time for dignity and the strength to say no more. No more childish behavior, no more acceptance of wrong-doings, no more being Mommy to a man who won't be a man.

You do deserve much more and a much better man. It is time to really move on. I'm sorry for your pain.

[limbo]

((((Cat))))

God you are so strong, You handled that whole thing with dignity and strength, I am not sure I would have been able to handle it that way!
You and your kids will be fine because they have you in there corner, you will make sure that they come through this, and one day somewhere down the line there will be someone waiting for you who will treat you the way you should be!!

Take care of yourself!

[Heartbroken]

Cat,

You have provided so much support to so many on these boards - now we will be here for you! You are an awesome woman and mother and H is just a fool. You will go on to a much happier life and that will be your revenge b/c your H will never find his happiness. Take care of yourself!

HB

[Aud31]

(((((((Cat)))))))

Know that you're loved and admired. My prayers are with you. I'm so very sorry.

Aud

[Aud31]

Just wanted to quote you from yesterday:

"ok, so if he is cheating again this is it, he goes, I only loose a liar and I can be happy on my own". Knowing that you will be ok if he leaves will help you stop freeting, I know my H's life would be a mess if we were to divorce, he'd have bigger internal issues in his hands, I, on the other hand, will have the peace and knowledge that I gave it my all and that I can be happy with my kids--of course I'd be sad and it'd be hard, but I won't be a wreck, I'd have no regrets.

No one else can say it better.

[IAChild]

Cat,

I'm in piecing too, so I lurk on your thread from time to time. I am so sorry your sitch has come to this point. While I know that DR ordinarily discourages us from snooping, I don't blame you that you did, and I have a lot of respect for you for the way you handled it.

I don't know how many children you have, or their ages, but by the amount of strength and determination you have demonstrated on this board, I know that you are up to the challenge to being the best parent for them.

Gracious and loving God, we raise Cat and her family to you in prayer. Envelop her with your peace; ground her in your strength; steel her with your unending love. Help us to be the support she needs in the midst of this storm.

We thank you for each and every member of this community. We thank you for opening our hearts and our minds and our eyes. Amen.

M

[believing_isaiah43]

sweet cat, my dear friend.

amen to the prayers raised on your behalf. may the God of all comfort be YOURS in this awful situation.

i am in no good place over here in stepford to dispense advice as if i have anything together. but you are LOVED and admired and decent and kind. we all appreciate you here.

hang on, friend. you DO NOT deserve this man's disrespect and lies. not. for. one. more. fcuking. minute. nor do your children. his life is about to be a hell of his own design; resist the urge to rescue him from it.

[[[[cat]]]]