Trixie, there is a book called "The Script: The 100% absolutely predictable things men do when they cheat" by Elizabeth Landers and Vicky Mainzer. I think you should check it out. I really believed for the first 6 months after my H left that he would never have an affair. Well I was dead wrong. But whether your H is or isn't time will tell.
ST
At the bar the Judge will not look us over for medals, degrees, or diplomas, but for scars. - Hugh B. Brown
I was sure my H was not having an affair! I told everyone he would never do that to me. Well, of course there was an OW and he admitted it about 1 month after he left. H totally dumbed down...OW convinced him to file for D, we went to court and I was all business...did not really give him the time of day the entire time we were seperated. H is now back home and our marriage is much better! We go to C and deal with the "why" and "how" of the whole sitch. Peacetoday...your post is EXACTLY how my H acted...EXACTLY
The numbers of affairs either PA or EA with an MLC are very high, just based off of the boards here and the number of people. Very very high, to the point where if your H is in MLC it is easier for you to prepare to discover an affair and figure on him having one.
Affairs are generally symptoms of the problems, not the cause of the problems in MLC. The OP is a bandaid. None of that helps ease the pain of discoverying an affair, but it does help knowing down the road if you manage to make it far enough to heal your R with your spouse.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
I might have been born at night, but it wasn't last night!
Maybe I was born last night! ...
I have already been on the OW merry-go-round when my first H cheated on me. So, when my (current) H left, that was the first thing I suspected. I tried to see what I could find out by checking phone records and talking to a few friends. I admit I found a few strange things and heard a couple of rumors about my H being seen with other women, but I have never been able to confirm anything. IMO, if my H has been involved with someone, it can't be very serious and not the bandaid that most MLCers are looking for...in fact, from the way my H talks, an OW would just be more pressure for my H.
I learned from my first marriage that if things don't make sense, there must be a reason for it. So, that being said, when MLC is involved, I guess anything is possible.
Hopefully you all don't think I am too much of a fool!
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