Keep up all the great DBing. Others here have given such good advice, I have little to add, except one thing about the porn. If my h and I are together, that's one thing. But if I found him with it by himself, I'd be weirded out, I admit.
Have I EVER looked at a well built guy and "lusted", umm, yes. Sure. But I'm talking about things I don't pursue or buy, but see on tv or in my face at sports events. I think the thing I'd be afraid of is that when we are being intimate, he's secretly wishing I were someone else that he has pictures of. That would hurt. (( j ))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Keep up all the great DBing. Others here have given such good advice, I have little to add, except one thing about the porn. If my h and I are together, that's one thing. But if I found him with it by himself, I'd be weirded out, I admit.
Have I EVER looked at a well built guy and "lusted", umm, yes. Sure. But I'm talking about things I don't pursue or buy, but see on tv or in my face at sports events. I think the thing I'd be afraid of is that when we are being intimate, he's secretly wishing I were someone else that he has pictures of. That would hurt. (( j ))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Been away. I'm very, very busy working. Need to re-build the cash machine that I once had, and now my head is finally clear enough to allow for it.
Mostly, I've been spending a tremendous amount of time with my wife and kids. Yep, it's all still going very well !!! Yesterday, we drove to San Francisco (about 2 hours) and had a fantastic day together. Today, S6 had his opening day for T-ball, plus since the kids are taking tennis lessons starting next week (their 2nd week of spring break) we went out and bought the entire family tennis racquets. Went to the park twice to play tennis today, total of three or four hours. My wife went out of her way to shoo the kids away from a court (we had two going) so she and I could play all by ourselves. My gosh, she looked so beautiful......
We haven't had any real R talks, just taking the time to reconnect, be around each other as a family. I will say this. There is no way that she would be spending this much time with me, having me over to her house (dinner there again tonight), or allowing herself to have fun with me if she wasn't in "comeback" mode.
I'm so excited about the prospect of this all working out. Full disclosure: I've been wearing my wedding ring again, but of course not around her or the kids. It feels good, it feels right.
If anyone is reading this post that feels their situation is hopeless, and especially if you've followed my saga for a while, you will see that anything is possible. Sure, I'm not "home" yet, but the progress being made is astounding. Less than two months ago my wife and I had a combined three restraining orders in place, and now, we are playing tennis together, laughing with our kids, having dinners as a family, and generally doing fine. Let's face it, 90% of you that have been following me will admit you saw this trainwreck as leading nowhere but a bitter divorce. Sure, it could still be the case, but WOW, I don't think so.
KEEP THE FAITH.......PRAISE GOD FOR ALL THAT HE HAS GIVEN.......DO NO HARM....
great, Amen. But I can't recall the very first post you had, so was it another screen name? Just curious. Still, the last 20 posts of yours which I did read, say exactly what you're saying. It is rarely hopeless. Two years ago, I'd have given my M maybe a 15% chance of working out. I didn't say a way out without HIM changing. And the only real changes in him, came after the ones in me, or at least that's when I was able to notice them...weird. But good!
Keep on keeping on.
(( j- ))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
But I can't recall the very first post you had, so was it another screen name?
Always been the same..... I'm not sure how to go back and look it up, but as you can see, my threads are numbered. First ten or so wereroman numerals. Thanks for checking in.
